I was bullied in Jr. High (back in the 60's) by a group of "cool" boys. I got called all kinds of names and was made to feel awful. When I went to my father about it he told me that the next time they started bullying me I was to hit them. He said he would take the heat for me if there were consequences at the school. It's interesting that I never had to hit anyone; I guess my attitude and reactions changed enough after I was given permission to react violently that the bullies realized it was not a good idea to continue.
C BApril 24, 2015
A couple of days ago my son called to give us an update on what is going on with his 13 yr old son at school. He has been being taunted by several boys at school over the past several months. He is called names such as: "you dirty Mexican" etc. He isn't a Mexican...in fact he is blue-eyed and light olive skin. If he were a Mexican it wouldn't make any difference. He still wouldn't deserve to be treated like this. His dad went to the school. The principle assured him that it would be taken care of...it wasn't. Then Dad went to the father of two of the boys. He was embarrassed that it was going on and that duo stopped the bullying. (Those two told our grandson that their dad was the one who talked bad about Mexicans all the time. Hmmmm.) But then another boy just kept the problem going even after the school and the parents assured them that it would stop. It didn't. So, a couple of days ago the boy set out again to humiliate and bully our grandson. When he came home on the bus his first words to his dad were, "I'm probably going to be in trouble at school." He said, "I told him, if he didn't stop I was going to punch him in the face. He just kept it up. So when we got to the bus, I said 'I warned you' and punched him in the face." Apparently the kid was so shocked that he had hit him that he sat silently in the bus all the way home. I don't condone violence, but when the adults are not willing to put a stop to the pain my grandson was exposed to nearly every day, I think he had the right to stop it himself. I just hope it doesn't escalate the problem...which it may. But my grandson felt justified and empowered by giving the boy some actual consequences for his bullying. He had been patient for a long time and had not fought back, but someone had to. It wasn't a "fight" it was just one punch. I hope it works.
Bob PowelsonApril 23, 2015
Two incidents come to mind. My two youngest sons attended early morning seminary. This was in Alberta, Canada where the winters are very cold.
The youngest was short and a bit chubby and seemed to be a choice victim. Particularly to three other boys who were the sons a the Stake President and two Bishops. There favored idea was to force him outside without his coat and once even his shoes. Then there would get great entertainment from listening to him cry and scream.
I found out and counselled him a bit. He wanted to quit seminary. I went directly to the fathers of the boys. My answer was the usual "boys will be boys" and "your boy is to mouthy". Nothing changed.
I was scheduled to give a Sacrament Meeting talk. I started the talk about this way. "Before I get to my topic I want to raise an issue that troubles my family. My youngest son wants to quit seminary because the abuse he is getting from three boys. They are (and I named them). I have asked their fathers to help solve the problem and nothing was done. (and I named the fathers).
I admit that it was extreme. It worked.
Junk BinApril 23, 2015
please submit 1. and 2. to the liberal, gay, socialists.
When they say no way, proceed with the physical correction technique
Don OlsenApril 23, 2015
"How To Stop Bullying For Good?" That's a very bold headline that gets people's attention. But if the solution were as simple as the author says the problem wouldn't exist, let alone be worsening. I agree with her premise that raising awareness of the problem is not enough, And her "Three Steps" are fine. But what's missing is where and how to teach these principles. It should happen at home but often doesn't. The community stepping up to help schools teach and empower students is an effective way to help deal with the problem.
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Grandpa ClydeMay 3, 2015
I was bullied in Jr. High (back in the 60's) by a group of "cool" boys. I got called all kinds of names and was made to feel awful. When I went to my father about it he told me that the next time they started bullying me I was to hit them. He said he would take the heat for me if there were consequences at the school. It's interesting that I never had to hit anyone; I guess my attitude and reactions changed enough after I was given permission to react violently that the bullies realized it was not a good idea to continue.
C BApril 24, 2015
A couple of days ago my son called to give us an update on what is going on with his 13 yr old son at school. He has been being taunted by several boys at school over the past several months. He is called names such as: "you dirty Mexican" etc. He isn't a Mexican...in fact he is blue-eyed and light olive skin. If he were a Mexican it wouldn't make any difference. He still wouldn't deserve to be treated like this. His dad went to the school. The principle assured him that it would be taken care of...it wasn't. Then Dad went to the father of two of the boys. He was embarrassed that it was going on and that duo stopped the bullying. (Those two told our grandson that their dad was the one who talked bad about Mexicans all the time. Hmmmm.) But then another boy just kept the problem going even after the school and the parents assured them that it would stop. It didn't. So, a couple of days ago the boy set out again to humiliate and bully our grandson. When he came home on the bus his first words to his dad were, "I'm probably going to be in trouble at school." He said, "I told him, if he didn't stop I was going to punch him in the face. He just kept it up. So when we got to the bus, I said 'I warned you' and punched him in the face." Apparently the kid was so shocked that he had hit him that he sat silently in the bus all the way home. I don't condone violence, but when the adults are not willing to put a stop to the pain my grandson was exposed to nearly every day, I think he had the right to stop it himself. I just hope it doesn't escalate the problem...which it may. But my grandson felt justified and empowered by giving the boy some actual consequences for his bullying. He had been patient for a long time and had not fought back, but someone had to. It wasn't a "fight" it was just one punch. I hope it works.
Bob PowelsonApril 23, 2015
Two incidents come to mind. My two youngest sons attended early morning seminary. This was in Alberta, Canada where the winters are very cold. The youngest was short and a bit chubby and seemed to be a choice victim. Particularly to three other boys who were the sons a the Stake President and two Bishops. There favored idea was to force him outside without his coat and once even his shoes. Then there would get great entertainment from listening to him cry and scream. I found out and counselled him a bit. He wanted to quit seminary. I went directly to the fathers of the boys. My answer was the usual "boys will be boys" and "your boy is to mouthy". Nothing changed. I was scheduled to give a Sacrament Meeting talk. I started the talk about this way. "Before I get to my topic I want to raise an issue that troubles my family. My youngest son wants to quit seminary because the abuse he is getting from three boys. They are (and I named them). I have asked their fathers to help solve the problem and nothing was done. (and I named the fathers). I admit that it was extreme. It worked.
Junk BinApril 23, 2015
please submit 1. and 2. to the liberal, gay, socialists. When they say no way, proceed with the physical correction technique
Don OlsenApril 23, 2015
"How To Stop Bullying For Good?" That's a very bold headline that gets people's attention. But if the solution were as simple as the author says the problem wouldn't exist, let alone be worsening. I agree with her premise that raising awareness of the problem is not enough, And her "Three Steps" are fine. But what's missing is where and how to teach these principles. It should happen at home but often doesn't. The community stepping up to help schools teach and empower students is an effective way to help deal with the problem.
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