As I became more comfortable teaching music in my assignment with the children at our church, I decided that since they had learned styles of music, it might be fun to play some simple instruments. As I thought about it, I remembered learning to play a comb with cellophane wrapped around it when I was young. In fact, I became the king of the comb and played to accompany my grade school class to sing. I have even done a couple of YouTube videos.

For those who have not heard this most notable instrument, it sounds like a kazoo. Anyone can do it. You have to learn to hum and buzz your lips against the cellophane at the same time.

I went to the dollar store and bought a bunch of combs of different sizes. I took them and a box of cellophane to church. When I pulled them out, the combination intrigued the children. I didn’t give cellophane to the youngest children for safety reasons, but they still got a nice comb. But the children who were around four years and older had a chance to play one.

It only took about fifteen minutes for every child to learn, some even faster. A few needed special help, but soon all got the hang of it. We then played a few of our favorite songs. As church ended, every child took a comb home with them, and the older children received some extra strips of cellophane. The older children were all buzzing out their favorite songs on their way to the parking lot. It sounded like hives of bees had made the church their home.

I promised the children if they would bring their combs back each week, we would play some songs together. The following week, most of them had their combs with them. One little boy didn’t. “My mom took mine and hid it,” he said. I had extras, so he was quickly back in the orchestra.

One father told me his two children played their combs incessantly all week. “If I end up killing you, I’ll be acquitted by reason of insanity,” he said.

I promised the children they could play at least one comb song for the community Christmas party, but I wanted something even more oriented to the season. I had searched the internet for inexpensive bells, but everything was way out of my price range. Then I came across a website that talked about conduits being cut in lengths to make different notes.

I bought some conduit and cut a bunch of each desired length. I drilled holes in them and put different colored strings for each note through the holes to hold them. I then bought some large nails and ground the pointed ends off. When I finished, I examined them.

“I think I better ream them out, or someone will get a finger stuck in one,” I told my wife, Donna.

“I don’t think that will happen,” she replied.

That Sunday, I hadn’t passed them out to the children for more than a minute before one little boy had his finger stuck in his. I took him to the bathroom and got soap on his finger to get it out. For obvious reasons, I also had to make a rule that if anyone used their chime to whack someone else, they lost it for the day.

Donna made a chart for each Christmas song we played with colored dots related to the string colors so the children would know when to hit theirs. I grouped them by age and notes. It sounded amazing for a children’s chime orchestra.

The desire to ding the conduit was so great that I found I needed to let them smack them with the nails for about thirty seconds before we could settle in and play the songs. I’m sure when they were all hitting their chimes at the same time, the dissonance made people wonder what we were up to. But with a little practice, we also played them for the Christmas party, and the parents were all complimentary.

It’s amazing what can be learned and what fun can be had with a few simple items.