Ideas and Society

I am assuming that most people reading this article are familiar with the five little monkeys nursery rhyme. In case you need a refresher, it’s about a mother that allows her five little monkeys (that I assume are children), to jump on the bed, one happens to fall off and bonks his head. Naturally, the mom calls the doctor and receives King Solomon-like advice, “no more monkeys jumping on the bed.” and like all good moms, she ignores the doctor’s instructions and continues to let her little monkeys jump on the bed.

If we were to tweak this nursery rhyme to reflect the attitude and mindset of our current culture, it would read something like this. “Five little monkeys jumping on the bed, one fell off and bonked his head, Mommy called the Doctor, and the Doctor said, ‘I am calling CPS.’”

Perhaps one of the most frightening things a responsible parent can hear is, “we are from the Child Protection Services.” Notice I wrote “responsible parents.” Everyone could agree that children must be protected from abuse or neglect. But what is becoming more common is the assault on parental rights on those that we want to be raising children.

Just this last year, several incidents between State authorities’ and law abiding parents made headlines, stocking debate once again about the State’s assault on parental rights. Some of these incidents involved parents being arrested and children being removed from their home. Each one of the cases involved activities that were typical for children just a few decades ago. I can’t begin to tell you how many times I rode my bike miles away from my home to visit friends.

Last month in Maryland, someone called CPS because they saw a couple of kids (ages ten and six) walking home from a park. A police officer picked them up, took them home accompanied by a social worker, threatening the parents that their children could be taken away for child endangerment? Yikes!

Other parents were not so lucky. A mom from South Carolina, Debra Harrell, spent a night in Jail and temporarily lost custody of her nine-year-old daughter for allowing her to play at a local park unsupervised while she worked her shift at a nearby McDonald’s. Similarly, a Florida mom was also arrested for letting her seven-year-old son walk from their home to a park to play. Keep in mind; these are just a few incidents that were reported in the news last year.

While most of those who have commented on these stories have raised the alarm about the ever growing power of the States that infringes on parental rights, I see something far more threatening to parental authority than the State. The danger I speak of is fear. Sadly, too many members of our society see life, and the world through the prism of fear.  The perception that danger lurks behind every corner is taking its toll on our communities. To be fair, much of the fear has been fueled by the media’s relentless messaging that the world is a scary place, especially for children. They report stories about child abductions as if they are random occurrences, which only make parents feel they need to be more protective and vigilant in protecting their kids

Behind each account discussed in this paper there was a person that saw a child without adult supervision and assumed the worse. Why wouldn’t they? After all, This is what we have been programmed to see. Anyone that knows a thing or two about emotions like fear understands that it results in irrational thinking. For example, I am afraid of roller coasters, one could quantify this with an explanation that my fear is based on how unsafe they appear; however, statistically speaking they are safer than my drive to or from the amusement park.

A focus group of parents was conducted where they discussed their fears about the dangers to their children. Here is what one parent said:

“Parental fear was related to lower levels of independent activities by children. In the discussion groups, parents described the effects of media coverage of cases of child abduction:” One mother was reported saying, “You think about these [stories] that you hear about … I’d much prefer to err on the side of caution and know they are safe than if something horrendous happens and regret it for the rest of our lives.”

But let’s look at the facts so we can get an idea of how safe our kids are on a daily basis. In one particular study, The National Center for Missing and Exploited Children reported that of 260,000 children that were abducted, only 115 would fit the “stereotypical kidnappings that involved someone the child did not know or was an acquaintance resulting in the child being held overnight, transported 50 miles or more, killed, ransomed, or held with the intent to keep the child permanently.”

Although each one of the 115 children represents untold grief and pain for their loved ones, it’s important to understand that there is no epidemic in our society of child endangerment. In fact, for that particular year the study was completed, the 115 children taken by complete strangers only accounted for one-hundredth of One percent (0.0001).

In addition to the media’s reporting of child endangerment, another primary contributor to this epidemic of irrational thinking is the breakdown of our communities. Stronger communities result in better citizens and more productive members of society. Studies have been conducted that show parents that are more likely to let their kids wander from home live in neighborhoods where they know their neighbors.

Although not mentioned, I would bet that most of those that allow their children to venture off on their own from home live in communities where many belong to the same church, or to some organizations that provide opportunities to form bonds. I believe that one of the consequences of our society becoming less religious and more secular is that people have become more isolated, less trustworthy and skeptical of those they do not know. Although we may have little to no power to change the laws of the land that infringe on parental rights, what we can do is to strengthen our community’s that create an environment that is both safe for kids, and bring peace of mind to parents.