The following is excerpted from LDS Living. To read the full article, CLICK HERE.
I sat in a Chili’s restaurant across from a close friend. We were discussing the gospel, and she said something along the lines of, “I just don’t know how to reconcile all the things I do believe with the things I don’t necessarily believe.” Boy, did I know how she felt.
I was raised in the Church and attended Brigham Young University. During my first year, I felt so out of place in church discussions. I felt like everyone knew things I didn’t know, and I allowed my insecurity to turn into embarrassment and feeling displaced. So I mostly stayed away from church activity through my 20s.
I started attending church regularly again at age 29, was endowed at age 32, and felt like I was on the path meant for me. But for years, I was still filled with so much doubt. I was going to church, praying constantly, and occasionally attending the temple. Yet I still felt like I was sitting on the fence—and it was exhausting.
It wasn’t until my 40s that I felt a welcome shift. I heard something gospel-related that would’ve normally created doubt and concern for me, but this time it didn’t. For some reason, at that moment, I knew it was OK if I didn’t understand everything.
I realized for the first time in my life that my understanding of the gospel didn’t have to be all or nothing. What I did know was enough for now, and over time, more things would likely make sense to me. I felt this heavy sense of worry lift off my shoulders.
To read the full article, CLICK HERE.
