My husband and I have spent the month welcoming all kinds of wonderful people and things that have appeared blessedly at our front door throughout December. Preeminent among those arrivals have been our children from nearby and far away who have come to celebrate Christmas with us. We have also often been surprised by small gifts on the doorstep thoughtfully placed there to greet us by generous well-wishers. It has all been a filling and fitting reflection of the wonder of December and the celebration of the birth of Jesus, the Gift of all Gifts. Our gift giving of all kinds – gifts of self and otherwise – is a blessed contribution to the opportunity December provides us every year to reflect on, and even seek to replicate in small ways, the concept of gift giving so notably reflected in the story of Christmas.
We raised our family in Southern California, but we almost always loaded our crew into an enormous van the day after Christmas to make the long ceremonial drive across the desert to Utah to visit my family and to ski. Usually on the 27th of December, we eagerly accepted an invitation from my father to spend the evening at his home in Salt Lake City for roast beef and his post-Christmas Christmas. The dinner was nice, but the real treat was always the gift ceremony that occurred in his living room after dessert. My husband and I and all of our kids sat in a circle ringing the room. My father eagerly offered customized gifts to us all, which we knew to open one at a time so that the whole crew could enjoy and applaud each carefully chosen treasure.
Every year we worked so hard to think of the perfect gift to give to my generous dad, until it occurred to us that our gift to him was peripheral to his pleasure. He found his Christmas joy in our joy. Our best gift to him then, was to receive his gifts with gratitude and grace. We continued to do our best to select gifts he might enjoy, but mostly we doubled down on the quality of our receiving.
In Charles Dickens’ book, “A Christmas Carol,” there is a scene where Mrs. Cratchit, the mother of Tiny Tim, serves the poor Cratchit family a small Christmas pudding she has worked hard to prepare for their benefit. The father and children wisely greet her entrance with that steaming pudding as if it were a genuine feast. Their effusive, grateful reception of her efforts assure her that her offering is welcome and worthy. The scene is a sweet one, and it demonstrates a wise truth. Without thoughtful, grateful receiving, a gift, however worthy, is unsatisfying and incomplete for both the giver and the receiver.
It is often said that it is better to give than to receive, but perhaps both the generous giving and the gracious receiving are essential halves of the blessed and heavenly whole. Without generous giving, there can be no opportunity for gracious receiving. But without gracious receiving, there will be no extended value or delight in the generous giving.
When our children gathered in our home this month, we watched with grateful wonder as even the smallest grandchildren offered to and received from each other and assorted family members their carefully chosen gifts. The good giving was adorable; the good receiving may have been more precious still. One unmarried great uncle had purchased small gifts for everyone in the room. He had been scouring catalogues for the perfect gifts all year. When he presented a set of artificial fingernails from the dollar store to his five-year-old great niece, she squealed with authentic delight, “This cannot be! My dream!” He beamed with pleasure at her honest, gleeful reception. The giving of the gift was nice; the receiving of it was even better. I suspect those fake nails will be used up and forgotten, but that uncle’s pleasure at her reception will last and sustain him for a long time.
Gift giving is essentially transactional in nature in the most fundamental regard, but when the gift is generously given and gratefully and graciously received, the exchange can provide a sweet opportunity for the building and nourishing of a relationship. What was transactional can become relational. The transaction may be secular and transient, but the resulting relationship can be deep and durable. People always matter more than things.
All our gift giving, at Christmastime and otherwise, is symbolic and reflective of the great giving of gifts we receive constantly from Heavenly Father. The scriptures are replete with instructive verses on the importance and benefit of deliberate, worthy reception of those gifts from God. Every reference offers rich implication of the layers of receiving in which heaven hopes we will engage in order to fully benefit from the myriad of glorious spiritual gifts we are offered. Every time, our conscientious receiving of the gifts of God fortifies our relationship with Him in a precious, powerful, covenantal way.
“The wise in heart will receive commandments” (Proverbs 10:8).
“He that receiveth you receiveth me, and he that receiveth me receiveth him that sent me” (Matthew 10:40).
“And whoso shall receive one such little child in my name receiveth me” (Matthew 18:5).
“And all things, whatsoever ye shall receive in prayer, believing, ye shall receive” (Matthew 21:22).
“Receive ye the Holy Ghost” (John 20:22).
“Receive ye one another, as Christ also received us to the glory of God” (Romans 15:7).
“Have ye received His image in your countenance?” (Alma 5:14).
“And he that receiveth all things with thankfulness shall be made glorious (Doctrine and Covenants 77:19).
“All those who receive my gospel are sons and daughters in my kingdom” (Doctrine and Covenants 25:1).
“He that receiveth my gospel receiveth me” (Doctrine and Covenenants 39:5).
“He that receiveth light and continueth in God receiveth more light” (Doctrine and Covenants 50:24).
Referring to receiving of both temporal gifts from each other and spiritual gifts from God, we might appropriately recommit to:
- Acknowledging and expressing gratitude for both gifts and the givers of them. Make a grateful phone call, or even write an old fashioned thank you note today!
- Unwrapping the gifts, literally and figuratively, delighting in them, and using them liberally
- Sharing the gifts with others joyfully and generously
Be grateful for gifts, use them, share them.
“God loveth a cheerful giver” (2 Corinthians 9:7). I am convinced that He also loveth a grateful and gracious receiver.
