Excellent reminder to hear, to listen, to feel what our children are saying. My son loved Star Wars toys, and spent hours in fantasy adventures. I was a busy father with many children and just couldn’t ‘get into’ to the Star Wars stuff Instead, I directed him toward sports - which I loved and he hated. My bad. I regret not ‘watching the ducks’ with my son. Mercifully, he has forgiven me. Sometimes forgiving oneself is the harder task.
JoMarch 31, 2026
This is a wonderful article for parents and a tangible guide for connecting to our children.Thank you for writing it. It’s also an article that an adult child could weaponize against their parents to estrange themselves because they feel the parent didn’t meet these important measures of parenting, which some therapists are now encouraging adult children to estrange themselves if they had challenges or hurt feelings in their childhood. I am a single mom who raised my children with love and gave them everything I could. I was not perfect, but I stood by them in their challenges and helped them with their homework and tucked them in at night and tried to make good memories together, etc. Now, I have an adult child who has estranged himself and kept me away from my grandchildren because he has hurt feelings from his childhood from some of the things you mentioned that he feels I failed doing, so his therapist has encouraged him to protect his peace and walk away from me without the opportunity for me to listen to his feelings and try to repair. I encourage parents to apply the guidance and advice of this great article. But maybe you might consider writing one for adult children, expressing that parents are not perfect and God wants families to have grace and forgiveness to one another as imperfect humans and that communication goes both ways,etc. Whatever you think would help heal families when adult children estrange themselves from their families who love them. . Thank you for your insights.
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MarciaApril 8, 2026
I agree with Jo!!
Herm OlsenMarch 31, 2026
Excellent reminder to hear, to listen, to feel what our children are saying. My son loved Star Wars toys, and spent hours in fantasy adventures. I was a busy father with many children and just couldn’t ‘get into’ to the Star Wars stuff Instead, I directed him toward sports - which I loved and he hated. My bad. I regret not ‘watching the ducks’ with my son. Mercifully, he has forgiven me. Sometimes forgiving oneself is the harder task.
JoMarch 31, 2026
This is a wonderful article for parents and a tangible guide for connecting to our children.Thank you for writing it. It’s also an article that an adult child could weaponize against their parents to estrange themselves because they feel the parent didn’t meet these important measures of parenting, which some therapists are now encouraging adult children to estrange themselves if they had challenges or hurt feelings in their childhood. I am a single mom who raised my children with love and gave them everything I could. I was not perfect, but I stood by them in their challenges and helped them with their homework and tucked them in at night and tried to make good memories together, etc. Now, I have an adult child who has estranged himself and kept me away from my grandchildren because he has hurt feelings from his childhood from some of the things you mentioned that he feels I failed doing, so his therapist has encouraged him to protect his peace and walk away from me without the opportunity for me to listen to his feelings and try to repair. I encourage parents to apply the guidance and advice of this great article. But maybe you might consider writing one for adult children, expressing that parents are not perfect and God wants families to have grace and forgiveness to one another as imperfect humans and that communication goes both ways,etc. Whatever you think would help heal families when adult children estrange themselves from their families who love them. . Thank you for your insights.
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