Your Hardest Family Question: What is the difference between helping and being used?
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LAMBAugust 30, 2020
Some people like to give, some avoid it, and some are martyrs. My elderly father lived in a mobile home park and when he got too old to change the oil on his car or smaller stuff like spark plugs, the truck driver next door would come over and do it for him. My dad paid him for the oil/parts and a just a little for the labor... he didn't have much living on about $900 a month social security. But Jimmy happily took care of my dad's car for years. My dad appreciated him so much and Jimmy liked helping my dad.
Julie JJuly 17, 2020
I don't have any expectations when it comes to helping someone. I want to help if I can, if I can't I can't. So I never feel used. When it comes to teaching someone to fish, that person can end up breaking their pole accidentally into little pieces and/or the fish won't come to them no matter what they try. So I wouldn't do that, Jesus says there will always be poor in need of help among us.
Wally GoddardJuly 17, 2020
Great counsel, Geoff!
MicheleJuly 17, 2020
I was raised to be a caretaker and it's difficult to know the line. I've found myself in this situation and burnt out. The Book of Mormon scripture where the poor had nothing to give but would if they could applies. That helped the sense of shame I had around letting go. There's also a great nationwide resource called Nextdoor, you sign up locally with your city. I learned about it when my daughter's furnace went out during a winter freeze. She received enough wood to burn until the furnace was replaced.
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