Like many people, I’ve spent a lifetime trying to find the right balance between Baby Jesus and Santa Claus at Christmas time. Although my parents always taught the true Christmas story, it’s also true that Mother would have us kids whipped into a frenzy of anticipation about Santa Claus that may have overshadowed the real thing.
The year I discovered the Santa Claus reality, I was severely crushed, but it was also the start of my understanding the more important aspects of Christmas giving. I think I got it right for many years, but then along came our own kids and, remembering the Santa magic I had felt before I knew, I couldn’t resist going a bit overboard in that direction again. And probably our kids have done the same with their kids and so on, everyone trying for the right balance.
Occasionally events happen around Christmas time that instantly put the focus exactly where it should be. Though those events can be painful, a few of them have provided deeply spiritual Christmas memories for us. When our fifth child, Richie, was born just before Christmas in 1968, he lived only eight hours. We were in graduate school in Indiana, far from our Utah families, with no money for Christmas presents, but the spirit in our apartment was incredibly sweet as we told our four little children about Jesus and what His coming meant for our family—that because he lived and died for us and was resurrected we also would live again and be with our Richie someday. I don’t remember thinking about Santa Claus at all that December.
Years later, when our children were teenagers, I was feeling overwhelmed one day with the pressures surrounding Christmas—gift buying, parties, concerts and dinners. I felt far from the true Christmas spirit, so I rebelled and headed for our mountain cabin for the day. I took a nap, fixed some hot chocolate, prayed and finally wrote a Christmas song that expressed exactly what I was feeling that day. The whole cabin experience seemed to reboot my spirit as I expressed what was truly in my heart through this Christmas song. We recorded it last year in 2013. I hope it will be meaningful to you too.
Lord, I Worship Thee
Words & music by Janice Kapp Perry
From the album “Christmas Magic All Around”
Vocals by Johanne Perry, Tammy Robinson, LaRene Tinney, Tanya Barkdull
I love to see the friendly sights of Christmas
The shoppers and the presents by the tree
But every year I like to pause
Far from toys and Santa Claus
To ponder what His coming means to me
To speak these gentle words on bended knee:
“Lord, I worship Thee.”
I love to hear the happy sounds of Christmas
The music of the season touches me
But I must find a quiet place
Far from noise and hurried pace
To offer praise to heaven privately
To sing my song where only He can see:
“Lord, I worship Thee.”
I love the way the world feels at Christmas
The happy crowds are beautiful to see
But also I need time to dream
Far from worldly Christmas scenes
To close my eyes and feel Him near to me
To cov’nant once again so willingly:
“Lord, I worship Thee.”
I remember another time when I had a whole new perspective on Christmas. Doug and I had just returned from serving a full-time senior mission in Santiago, Chile. Our Christmas celebrations there were with the district and missionary choirs we directed, and it was a time of pure joy! No gifts were exchanged, except the kind we will hold in our hearts forever—seeing talents developed and shared with confidence, and feeling the love of the Chilean Saints. We also saw poverty and difficult living circumstances, but we learned to love a people who knew how to have so much fun dancing and singing and enjoying life with little money. We learned much from them.
Returning home just before Christmas, I felt overwhelmed with melancholy every time I tried to shop at the big flashy mall. In fact I just couldn’t do it. As I watched people buying so many things they could hardly carry them to their cars, I just wept inside thinking how much some of that money would mean to our humble Chilean friends. I celebrated Christmas very simply that year, and mostly through the music of the season. I often thought of how it must have felt in Bethlehem just before Christ’s birthday—no one could have known that the baby who was to be born the next day would change everything for everyone!
Softly Falls the Evening Light
Words by Orrin G. Hatch / Music by Janice Kapp Perry
From the album “Christmas Magic All Around”
Solo by Adrienne Stiefel
Softly falls the evening light
Drifting into candlelight
The weary sheep lay low tonight
As shepherds rest with watchful eyes
Evening shadows now grow dim
Upon the town of Bethlehem
As unaware they close their eyes
Upon this hallowed silent night
Chorus
A single star now marks the place
A humble manger now awaits
The holy babe whose healing light
Will pierce the darkness of this won’drous night
Angel choirs in silence wait
To herald Christ with songs of praise
Revealing to the eager earth
The wonder of His sacred birth
Men through ages long have prayed
That peace would come to earth someday
But who could know that God’s own Son
Upon this very night would come
Repeat Chorus
Softly falls the evening light
Drifting into candlelight
The universe in rev’rence hums
Tonight the Savior comes
Two weeks ago, just three days after we had enjoyed a glorious Thanksgiving feast with all the family, stretching three and a half banquet tables long through our home, I felt on top of the world and was looking forward to diving into Christmas details, when I was suddenly blindsided by a rather violent case of the flu. For the next ten days I was sicker than I remember being for a couple of decades. The misery of chills, fever, nausea, vomiting and aching everywhere was made worse by the thought that the house was not decorated for Christmas, the tree was not up, I had done no shopping and written no Christmas letters.
But finally the sickness just overwhelmed me and those thoughts were gone. I tried everything to avoid dehydration but all the Gatorade and water I drank just went straight through me one way or the other. After several days of this struggle I ended up in the ER receiving IVs to hydrate me and medicine to hopefully stop the nausea. It didn’t. In our extremities we turn to the Lord and plead for relief from our suffering, and he usually sends friends to help us.
Through these ten days I felt such gratitude for family and friends who did so much to help me. As my symptoms finally started to ease, I sometimes cried with gratitude for so many things: For my husband who, though he cannot remember some things now, remembered the words for a priesthood blessing that comforted me; for my daughter Lynne’s chicken soup; for my foster son Mark who brought acidophilus pills and gave me a “booster blessing”; for my devoted and caring visiting teacher Lynn who brought every kind of food she thought a sick person might tolerate; for my friend Julie who brought delicious taco soup on the first day I could eat regular food; and for friends and family who prayed for me.
I’m thankful for schmaltzy Hallmark Movies that got me through many sick evenings. Sometimes I didn’t know if I was crying over my sickness or the always-happy endings of their Christmas shows. I’m thankful for BYU-TV whose motto is “Helping us see the good in the world.” They helped me through a few rough days too, when it was hard to see the good in the world.
It’s been two weeks today since my illness began. I’m thinking clearly again, feeling grateful for so many things, getting out in the sunshine again for short walks, not stressing about Christmas. I guess it’s good that our life experiences bring us up short now and then and help us see what really matters. As the new church video says, “He is the Gift,” and that is the thought that is carrying me through another season when I feeling I am “Getting Christmas Right.”
God in Heaven, Guard the Manger
Words by Orrin G. Hatch / Music by Janice Kapp Perry
From the album “Christmas Magic All Around”
Vocals by Joseph Moor, Nyrie Tyler
On a quiet Christmas morn
Jesus Christ our Lord was born
In a stable soft and warm
He first lay in Mary’s arms
Chorus
God in heaven, guard the manger
Where the baby Jesus sleeps
Shelter Him from harm and danger
Breathe Thy warmth upon His cheeks
Joseph watched in silent awe
At the miracle He saw
Knowing he would be the one
To protect this holy son
Repeat Chorus
Tiny baby in the hay
Did you know you came to save
Leaving Father’s throne above
Bringing to the world His love
Repeat Chorus
Sleep tonight in peace serene
Rest as heaven’s angels sing
With their carols heralding
Him who would be King of Kings
Repeat Chorus
Shelter Him from harm and danger
Breathe thy warmth upon His cheeks
Janice Kapp Perry: Composer, author, lecturer
Songs from this article are from the album CHRISTMAS MAGIC ALL AROUND and can be found in the Christmas Music section of https://www.JaniceKappPerry.com
