Prom season is just about behind us now, so today marks the end of the topic of prom attire at Sunday meetings.  Viewpoints have spanned the spectrum, with some feeling passionate about the subject ? at one extreme or the other.   It’s always fun to see what other people have to say, so let’s get started with this week’s letters:

I must disagree to some extent with the original letter about prom dresses.

When I was a high school senior and went to the prom I wore my (very modest) dress to sacrament meeting the next day.  No where in my fairly innocent 17-year-old brain was I thinking that I was showing off, trying to indicate that I’d never gone home the night before, or thinking that
I would make someone else feel bad about not having gone to the prom.  It was just another opportunity to wear my beautiful dress one more time.

Having said that, I had no understanding 27 years ago of the true sacredness of the ordinance of the sacrament.  I’m not sure if no one was talking about that back then, or if I just missed those messages.  (In fact, it makes me far more uncomfortable to remember the showy clarinet solo I played than to remember the dress I wore after the prom.)  I’m sure if one of my parents had expressed concern that my formal dress was going to detract from someone’s worship experience that day, I would have reconsidered my clothing choice.  But they didn’t, and I have always been grateful to those adult friends in the ward who made loving comments to me that day.

This topic sounds like a place where more parental teaching could be used, and charity and compassion from everyone else. 

Cindy in North Carolina

Amen to that, Cindy.  We’re all at different stages of our spiritual development, and even those who are spiritual giants were not necessarily always so.  Charity and compassion are always good ideas, because we who give those things today may be the recipients of those things tomorrow.

I agree with the comment about prom dresses at church. I had lived in Chicago for many years, then in Alabama and Colorado. I never saw a prom dress at church. Recently, I moved back to Utah and saw several on a Sunday morning. I agree with all the comments made by “Allergic to Proms in Austin” about the messages wearing your prom dress to church sends.

Tom

Wearing prom dresses at church must be a regional thing, Tom.  It is also cyclical.  Our ward hadn’t done it for twenty years, but last week two girls wore their knee-length dresses from “Mormon Prom” to church.  One dress was greatly benefited by a sweater that was worn over it to conceal what would have been bare shoulders.  The sweater did not detract from the look of the dress, and actually enhanced the outfit.  The other dress was absolutely gorgeous, and the wearer proudly showed me how her creative mother had altered the dress to make it LDS-appropriate.  I was surprised to see both dresses at church, but glad for the opportunity to share the girls’ prom experiences with them.

You are basically going to receive two types of letters on this; those who approve and those who don’t.

Let’s be realistic at first and say “so what!” about prom dresses at church.  If it is modest and fits church standards, I don’t see any real reason for the animosity.  If it doesn’t meet church standards, that is another issue best left to the parents of the girl (and not a topic for gossip or backbiting, but it generally becomes one).

Let me refer to the people opposed to prom dresses as “the detractors” (instead of calling them the spiteful, vindictive, immature, jealous, petty little snipes that they actually are).

Now, detractors will say that it is the vanity of the girls showing off their pretty, new dresses.

Think about this for a second.  Every teenage girl and Primary girl shows off their new dresses!  These just happen to be a little fancier and a little more expensive.  Every girl thinks that the world revolves around their hair and appearance.  It would be no different if they were wearing a different dress.

Detractors will say that these girls are bragging about having dates to rub it into the faces of the girls who are less pretty or didn’t get asked out.

I say, get a life!  The fact that you never got asked to your prom 10, 20, or 30 years ago, for whatever reason, shouldn’t still be weighing on your mind and causing you to have negative feelings about the girls who did.  Isn’t it about time you grew up and moved on?

Any detractors trying to say that the girl is showing off she didn’t go home the night before are seeing sin without evidence.  They really need a worthiness interview with their bishop on their own attitude towards others.

The young men in several of my wards have worn their tuxedos to church the day after prom.  They also strut around, looking proud of themselves.  This also looks very professional in administering the sacrament.  Why aren’t the detractors saying bad things about them?

On this whole issue of negative thoughts or feelings about prom dresses that meet church standards: it all boils down to the immaturity, jealousy, and vindictiveness of the detractors.

Alan W. Hatch

You’re a brave man for signing your name to the above letter, Alan, but you said many thought-provoking things.  After all, that’s the reason this column exists.

Nevertheless, it’s just as well you didn’t include your address.  I’d hate to think of a gaggle of “petty little snipes” gathering on your doorstep and pummeling you with wrist corsages.

The church handbook statement listed below was my first thought on what principles we need to keep in mind when we sing/dress/speak at church.  If you think about it, this is applicable to anything we do in a Church service.

If you read the rest of the section referred to below, it talks about our choices of instruments and the fact that all sacred music is not necessarily appropriate in an LDS church setting.  We are instruments, so are we just calling attention to ourselves in our dress and becoming a distraction to the meeting (like there are not enough of those already).

Claritin Clear may have “had the back” of her YW to win this little turf battle, but was she backing up the Lord or his servants who have tried to guide us into focusing more on the Lord during our worship so the YW can ultimately win the war by focusing on Christ?

My husband is currently a bishop, and he recently interviewed a Young Woman for her Young Woman recognition the morning after prom.  Her dress had a shrug and was modest, but she and other girls wore a tiara.  It was so out of place that it was difficult for him to do the interview.  When he called her up to give her the medallion, it was a little shocking to everyone.

My daughter chose to wear her formal to church despite her father’s counsel not to wear it.  Because it was simple and not a typical ball gown, it did not seem too distracting, but I felt the earrings added just enough to create the too-formal-for-church look and I felt like that made it inappropriate.


 

  I noticed people kept turning around to look at the girls.

 

 

Whatever choice they make goes to show whether they are there to worship or to socialize or whether they value the opinions of people more than God’s.  At that age, it may be expected, but what trend does it set?  I believe if they took their worship more seriously they wouldn’t try to draw so much attention to themselves.  I really applaud the idea of a Young Women night where they got to wear their dresses again was excellent (and those who didn’t go could model borrowed dresses).

Here is the passage I mentioned:

Handbook 2 14.4.2 

Music in Church meetings should not draw attention to itself or be for demonstration. This music is for worship, not performance. 

Trying in VA

Oh, do I love that quote, Trying.  There are all too many organ arrangements in the Church (and I’m talking about all the way to the highest levels of performance) that completely distract from the purpose of worship, and exist solely for the purpose of calling attention to the organist.  Fie on the music arrangers who put in the gratuitous key changes and organ riffs that take away from the spirit of worship, all for the purpose of making the organist look good.  Double fie on the organists who choose those arrangements!

Okay.  I guess you can see you’ve touched a hot spot with me.  I’m going to climb down from the soapbox now and back away from it so we can return to topic.

Back in the day (early 1970s) everyone wore a long dress to church, it was considered “best dress.” Nowadays, the Young Women contingent wears a khaki skirt, flip flops, two shirts and a hoodie. To me, this is definitely not best dress.

If a prom dress is modest and dressy, why not? The flowers are ok by me too.  After all, mothers always used to wear them on Mother’s Day, Easter, and in my mother’s case, my father always had a corsage for their anniversary.

I can understand the indignation over plunging necklines and backlines and high hems and all the extremes. My girls wore their homemade prom dresses to church the next day and there was no tittering/whispering behind hands ? just exclamations of how pretty they were. What church does this woman attend that modest prom dresses would be thought of in this manner?

I would rather see the dressy prom dresses than the usual YW uniform as mentioned above. These young women then turn into future moms and temple attendees. You can sure tell the difference between my idea of Sunday best at the temple and theirs. I have worked in the temple for six years now, and it has become very casual in most instances.

My former bishop once wanted us to teach the Relief Society sisters about dressing their children modestly. I am all for it, but you know what? That teaching is best done at home! If you don’t allow the immodesty and don’t supply it, they will learn. I had three lovely girls who are still lovely and make the distinction between Sunday best and work/casual clothes. Am I just howling in the dark here? 

Confused in Utah
 

Judging by the letters I’ve received on this subject, Confused, if you are indeed howling in the dark you are not howling alone.  If you are howling in a chorus, please don’t use ostentatious organ music when you do it at church.  The handbook counsels against that!

Since I’ve been assaulted by my neighbors with photos of their daughter’s swim suits ? er, I mean prom dresses ? I would love to see modest prom dresses anywhere!

What I think brings an issue with prom dresses in church, is that they really aren’t modest.  The tightness or revealing nature of the dress creates a distraction from the sacredness of the sacrament.  The “For the Strength of Youth” pamphlet states, “Immodest clothing includes short shorts and skirts, tight clothing, shirts that do not cover the stomach, and other revealing attire. Young women should wear clothing that covers the shoulder and avoid clothing that is low-cut in the front or the back or revealing in any other manner. Young men should also maintain modesty in their appearance. All should avoid extremes in clothing, appearance, and hairstyle. Always be neat and clean and avoid being sloppy or inappropriately casual in dress, grooming, and manners. Ask yourself, “’Would I feel comfortable with my appearance if I were in the Lord’s presence?’” 

Parents and leaders need to spend time having the youth define “tight clothing,” “low-cut,” “revealing,” “modest,” “extremes.”  Certainly our youth are generally better than the world’s standards, but the Lord wants them to be their best

Assaulted in the Bible Belt

The prom dresses in your area must be very interesting, Assaulted.  I’d like to see them (or maybe I wouldn’t). 

I like your suggestion of having the youth in a ward determine what those key words from the handbook mean to them.  That might be a good pre-prom topic every year.

I go to a ward where it has long been a tradition for our young people to wear their prom attire to church the morning after prom (our young men wear their tuxes also, as they don’t usually have to be returned until Monday).  I always look forward to seeing our youth so beautifully attired and looking so beautiful. 

What hits me most about this practice is the beautiful self-image these youth portray.  Even youth who at other times feel unaccepted or as if they don’t fit in hold themselves proudly when so dressed up.  Each seems to radiate the beautiful spirit he or she has inside.  Even if at other times they seem self-conscious, shy, or as if they are trying to hide, on this one day they hold themselves proudly and accept themselves as the beautiful children of God they are.

I don’t find this distracting in a bad way. I think any experience that helps our youth feel beautiful and proud of themselves as children of God is a good thing.  I also am proud of the example they set to younger youth of being modestly attired while being beautifully attired.  In this day when immodest formal attire is almost the only thing you can easily buy (at least here in the Northeast), it is wonderful to see our youth modeling what can be achieved with a little effort.

One side note: Prom dresses can be expensive, especially modest ones that have to be specially ordered.  Many youth in our ward share.  I know my daughters have brought prom dresses from previous years (they wore only the one weekend) to youth meetings so that other girls can take them to use themselves for their prom and thereby save money.  It works particularly well in our area where we share a building with another ward and, between the two wards, there are 5-6 school districts represented.  But I think it is something that can be beneficial anywhere.    

Proud Mom in Maine

That’s a great idea of having a prom dress exchange, Proud Mom.  I hope lots of youth leaders all over the prom-holding world follow your example.


 

 

 

I don’t see what the problem is with wearing a modest fancy dress, prom dress or otherwise, to church ? but it seems to me what you are talking about are dresses that weren’t modest and shouldn’t have been worn in the first place! 

It reminds me of the scripture in Isaiah 3:16: “the daughters of Zion are haughty, and walk with stretched forth necks and wanton eyes, walking and mincing as they go . . .”   Isaiah was referring to the “daughters of Zion” (in other words the members of the Church), and he was talking about our day!   

Obviously, an immodest dress has no place at church.  And while we are on the subject of dresses, on the other extreme is denim.  How come it is that it wouldn’t be appropriate to wear a pair of jeans to church but you turn your old pair into a skirt and suddenly that makes it OK?  Maybe I’m getting old, but it feels to me like we are losing respect for the Sabbath day and along with it, forget that sacrament meeting is a sacred meeting. 

When I was a child, I wouldn’t have run in the chapel if the building was on fire!  I don’t know what I thought would have happened if I had run in there but I remember the tremendous feeling of respect and love I had for that room.  The chapel was a special place.  You were quiet as soon as you entered.  You didn’t run around.  You wore your best clothes and you treated that space with reverence. 

I had the same feeling when I entered the temple for the first time.  I was five years old and went to be sealed to my parents.  That too was a sacred place, worthy of my best behavior, and I wore my very best dress.  No doubt my parents had a lot to do with teaching me to respect sacred places.  I think if we thought more about what we are there to do in these sacred places, than on being seen and socializing, we would choose more appropriate clothing and act more appropriately.

Thoughtful

Thanks for quoting Isaiah, Thoughtful.  I always feel better when there’s a column with at least one scripture in it!

As for denim, I’m of two minds about that.  I personally don’t wear denim because the fabric is so heavy and the last thing I need is to be hotter than I already am.  But I am bemused when I look at the clothing catalogs and see the same dress done in denim and in cotton and in twill.  Sometimes they don’t even tell you which colors are the denim ones so you have to make a guess.  I’ve always wondered why one dress would be appropriate and the other one wouldn’t.  I’m not smart enough to answer that question!

I’ve never heard of/seen anyone wearing a prom dress.  Perhaps it might be something to bring up with the YM/YW folks, so they can, first, help them choose proper attire to start with and then, let folks know it’s not acceptable attire for church.  Strange custom. 

Janet

Yes, it’s a strange custom, Janet.  But we are a curious people, and I’m betting we have lots of strange custom.  That’s what makes us so endlessly interesting.

I am a soldier serving in Afghanistan, and I have four beautiful daughters.  Two of them were of age to attend their prom this year, so this article piqued my interest. 

I grew up in Utah, but since joining the Army, haven’t lived there for 15 years.  We currently live in a ward that has a handful of Young Women.  There was a comment by First Time Prom Mom that really struck me.  She said “Is there actual counsel from above the stake level on this subject?”  I would have to say, yes!

Dress standards are explained pretty clearly in the “For the Strength of Youth” pamphlet.  But what really strikes me is, we are blessed to have bishops and stake leaders who are inspired to guide the members of their individual wards and stakes.  Each ward is different and it is the bishop who is entitled to receive revelation for his ward.  And members are blessed by following the council given by their bishop.  Prom dresses and tuxes at church?  Your bishop has guidance tailored for your ward; the Brethren are busy taking care of a worldwide church.

Classification: Unclassified

That was a good reminder, Unclassified, that the buck stops with the bishop of a ward.  What is appropriate in one ward may not be appropriate in another.  It may not be appropriate in the same ward at a different time.  If you have any reservations about prom attire in your ward, the bishop is the final arbiter.

P.S.  Thanks for your service in Afghanistan.  I never want to miss an opportunity to thank the men and women who sacrifice so much to maintain peace around the world.

I am a 67-year-old grandmother who has the blessed opportunity to be a live-in nanny for my son and his wife and their three daughters, ages 9, 5, and 2.  I joined the Church at 21 and learned values of appropriate attire for church and temple. I have finally boiled it down, as only a grandmother can do:    I never want a young man to look at my precious granddaughters with lust ? only with admiration and pride.  And that will completely depend on the young girl and what her parents have taught her. 

When a general authority speaks, he speaks for God.  I do not buy into the notion, “We should let them enjoy these fashions while they can; too soon they will be restricted to temple standards!”  Proms or immodest wedding gowns are not an excuse to forego Christ-centered instructions of modesty.  Exposure to things of the world is inescapable, but we have the Light of Christ as nonmembers, and the Holy Ghost as members to help us discern.  This is a lifelong challenge.

As a young MIA president, I too enjoyed seeing the seniors at church in their attire after the prom.  Not so much today.

We preach the gospel of Jesus Christ. The goals are lofty, but should not be lowered because of a single event, or the trends of the day.  On the contrary, we are capable of stepping up the standards!  Our girls can cross that bridge with totally appropriate attire, beautiful, stylish and memorable forever.  I totally salute them!  They are the cream, and will rise to top positions of leadership in their time.

In the end my son eventually will see how young men look at his beautiful daughters.  It is his choice now to determine that by teaching modesty and the reason for it. He and his wife will set the examples.

About dressing up?  It should be so obvious.  We feel better about ourselves when we are clean and in our best attire at church.  We ought to make that effort.  We show reverence and respect for things holy.  And when we feel better about ourselves, we perform better, speak nicer, and are more forgiving to those who do not yet have this vision for themselves.  Example is the best teacher, accompanied by loving words about “coming clean” before the Lord.


 

It would be wonderful if, by prom time, all our young women managed to achieve this level of maturity.

 

Lastly, the temples are our refuge as a people.  We prepare for this every day, starting with what clothes we put on.  And if it includes the whole armor of God, we should feel very good about ourselves.

Grand Nanny in Tacoma

We do feel perform better when we feel better about ourselves, Grand Nanny.  Thanks for pointing that out.

As long as they are modest there isn’t a thing wrong with the girls wearing their beautiful dresses to sacrament meeting.    I think it’s wrong to think they are doing it to say, “Look how pretty I am.”  They just feel beautiful, and it’s a perfect place for them to wear it one more time.  Let the girls “show off” that dress. 

Cheerleader

I don’t think there’s anything wrong with girls thinking they are pretty, Cheerleader ? especially at an age when so many of them suffer from self-esteem.  I do hope the Young Women leaders and others will drill into them over and over again that real beauty comes from the inside. 

I have been threatening to write a Mormon etiquette guide for years. It seems in the Church that people have never heard of decent manners, as borne out by kids (and adults!) rushing the refreshment table and grabbing 8-10 cookies! I could go on and on with examples.

This issue is just part of the same syndrome. Proper etiquette is meant to help us maintain a civilized society. If we all continued to follow it, life would be so much more pleasant for everyone. For instance, evening wear is never appropriate in the day time! Period! That is all that is needed to know not to wear prom attire to church. I have always found it to be very distracting.

Yes, ideally we should be able to concentrate on the sacrament no matter what is going on, but I for one have a hard time with that. I am very visual and so I can hardly help seeing bare toes in sandals, prom or Sunday dress cleavage, or young men with waist-length hair. Wearing our “Sunday best” does not include expensive evening wear. It means the best we have that is appropriate for the occasion.

These poor girls can only wear their dress once? Will brides now start wearing their gowns the Sunday after the wedding? I will never forget an Ensign article years ago where a parent lamented not being able to afford a suit for their son to wear to church. The authority asked if they owned a television!  It is all about priorities.

Am I always polite? No. Do I always dress perfectly appropriately? No. But I do try to do the best that I can, which also includes not judging or berating someone else for what they are wearing that is also not appropriate. I have to rush off now ? I have a chapter of my book to start on….. 

Jeannie from Missouri, aka Miss Manners of Mormondom

Let us know when you publish that book, Jeannie.  I’m sure a lot of us would enjoy reading it.

I have been reading with great interest the debate on wearing formal prom attire to sacrament meeting.  Thankfully, this isn’t a problem we have to deal with in the UK, as formal dances are not part of our youth culture here, but being detached from the issue I began to consider a broader question.  What right do we have to criticise or condemn what other people choose to wear to church?  Yes, we have a dress code and rightly so, but as with so many of the Lord’s commandments, it is up to the individual to decide how it applies to them.

There are so many pitfalls in trying to determine for other people how they should dress for church.  For instance, my pet hate is sisters wearing flip flops to church, but I have no right to criticise those who do or demand that they wear something more substantial on their feet. 

On the other hand, a number of years ago we had a sister in our ward who always came to church dressed with great elegance and style, even to the extent of wearing a hat to complement her outfit. Some people may have thought this was going too far, especially for those of us who were blessed with neither her income nor her dress sense, while others simply admired her perfectly groomed appearance.

Do you see where I’m going with this?  Once we start making decisions for other people we lose a sense of perspective and sight of the bigger picture, which is that we are at church to participate in taking the sacrament to renew our covenants with our Saviour and to seek the guidance of the Holy Ghost in improving the way we live our own lives.  Not other people’s lives but our own.

We make decisions for ourselves, not others.  We teach our own families, not other people’s.  If someone thinks there is a serious problem in their ward with young men and women wearing their formal prom clothes to church then they should raise the issue with their bishop, and let him deal with it.  Otherwise leave it alone.

Angela

London, UK 

Angela, your last two paragraphs really brought this topic home.  I have enough things to deal with in my own life without trying to make decisions for the people around me ? especially decisions that relate to something as inconsequential as style.  The fish I’m frying stink enough that the last thing I want to do is fry somebody else’s fish.

As a Young Women leader a few years back, I first saw this custom and felt that it was OK in that I didn’t think anyone would wear a frankly immodest gown to Church.  The practice encouraged Young Women to choose modest prom dresses, kind of like being accountable for their choices.  Some of the previous letter-writers would argue, and I have no response to the immodesty issue other than, “Where are their mothers (or loving leaders) when they walk out of the house (let alone walk in the church doors)?”  And certainly, outlandishly flashy clothing could also be seen as irreverent.

Oddly, it never once occurred to me that it meant, “I went to prom and you didn’t.”  I never went to a prom, and I suppose I could have had all that teenage angst wash over me again, but it didn’t.  I’m afraid that because I didn’t think of it personally, I didn’t worry much about some girls who didn’t wear prom dresses.  I guess I figured they just chose not to wear their dresses.  Now I’ll have to go back and worry about it, I guess.

Nancy

You’d better go back and worry about it, Nancy!  The fate of the free world is depending on our knowing why a teenage girl chose (or didn’t choose) to wear a prom dress to church!

This opened up a whole new train of thought for me.  I haven’t had a prom-goer in my family in a long time and have enjoyed seeing the Young Women in their beautiful dresses.


 

  Most have been modest, and the others have usually worn a sweater over their dress.  I have never found it to be distracting.

 

Nevertheless, the comment in the article about, “I went to the prom and you didn’t,” hit home.  I had never thought about it that way.  We do have several lovely girls in our ward who never seem to date (I’ve always wondered why), and this could be a slap in the face to them.  I don’t however, think it takes away from the spirit of the meeting any more than a visitor or investigator wearing slacks.

At the bottom of the article there was a blurb by someone who did hit on a major gripe of mine, and that is flip flops or sandals with bare feet.  We live in a dusty area and the dirty feet we often see are not attractive.  Also, some women in our ward wear extremely tight clothing and skirts so short I wonder how they can possibly wear them after they have been to the temple.  This is going to be an interesting piece to follow!

Kellie

It has been an interesting thread, Kellie, hasn’t it?  I never tire of reading other people’s opinions.  Most of them are so convincing that they change my mind as I read them.  I always end up more in the middle of a point of view after these discussions than I was at the beginning.

Wearing prom dresses to church is not a tradition here in Florida.  I’ve never seen it. But I do have a couple thoughts:

1. It is an added incentive to choose a prom dress that is modest and fits the standards.
2. We are told to wear our “best” to church.
3. Our youth have so many standards and rules and regulations that I am happy to cut them some slack on areas that aren’t regulated. Do we really need something else to harp at them about?

Glad we don’t have the tradition here, but honestly let’s cut the kids some slack.

Sandee

You make an excellent point, Sandee.  Our youth are given so many restrictions on so many things that it’s nice to let them make their own decisions this one weekend of the year.  If we find them distracting, maybe we can just shut our eyes during the sacrament and concentrate on the ordinance rather than the attire of the person sitting in the next pew.

The short answer is that prom attire is inappropriate, but there are far weightier matters in this life.

I would like to add that we had a teenage daughter who was going through difficult times and wore ragged jeans, a black leather jacket and a chip on her shoulder to church.  I was asked more than once if I knew that her attire was inappropriate.  (I was the Relief Society president and my husband was in the stake presidency. So yes, we did know).  She was at church with us and that was all that mattered to me at the moment.

We have spent 40 years away from the “body” of the Church, and most of the new converts in our ward did not even own a dress or skirt when they were baptized.  I hope that no one made them feel bad about what they wore to church.

I know that this reply is sideways to the subject at hand, but I wanted to share it.  We are all growing in our understanding of the gospel and need to cut each other some slack.

Been There, Done That

Well said, Been There.  We have a couple of Young Women in our ward who rarely come to their Young Women meetings.  When they come, they wear slacks and hoodies.  I’ve never been a fan of hoodies, being older than Noah, but if that’s the way they come to church I’m more than happy to see them.  I’d rather have them wearing slacks and hoodies to their Young Women meetings than wearing their slacks and hoodies in the parking lot or at home.

As I have never seen a prom dress in sacrament meeting, this is a new thought to me.  It brings up a couple of thoughts.

The first thought is that I would hope a young woman would not wear something to the prom that would be deemed inappropriate for Sunday morning.  Something backless, shoulderless, or sheer should be left on the rack in the store. 

Secondly, if I remember correctly (and it was indeed many years ago), getting ready for prom meant feeling the prettiest I had ever felt.  I can see that a Young Woman would want that feeling to last as long as possible.  One would hope that she would wash and change her hair and makeup, but I do think anything that is truly modest could be worn, again, I guess I am thinking if it is not appropriate for sacrament meeting it shouldn’t be worn on Saturday night, either? 

The third thing that comes to my mind is that this young woman has gotten up after a late night and come out to church.  As the mother of an inactive daughter, I would love to see my girl in sacrament meeting.  Period.

And last, but certainly not least, when did it become our job to judge these young people?  (Let their parents shoulder that job.) They, after all, were born after us, thus being even more Latter-day than we, doesn’t that make them even more valiant souls?  Just sayin’….

Tess in Vegas

Tess, your letter was so compassionate that I chose it to end the subject of prom attire in church.  I, too, want a young girl’s feeling of prettiness to last as long as possible.  And I can certainly see that any young girl who attends church at all after a late night at prom should be commended and not condemned.  Thanks so much for reminding us of that.

Okay, people, that subject is closed.  But before I end today’s column, here’s a letter that is meant for Vietnam vets and their friends and relatives.  Please do not respond to me on this subject because I know nothing about it.  This is purely a press release designed for people who participated in the Vietnam War:

Dear VASAA Folks and Friends with an interest in what happened among the LDS in Viet Nam:

Dr. Robert Freeman of BYU and the director of the “Saints at War” Project asked (to) put out the word about a very special conference to be held on 11 November 2011 at BYU.  It will feature Elder Lance Wickman of the Seventy as main speaker.  Elder Wickman,
as you no doubt know, is a Viet Nam vet.

One of the other major events at this conference will be the premiere of the third in the “Saints at War series, this time on Viet Nam.  It’s been about seven years in the making, so this will be an extraordinary situation to see what’s been put together.  If you know of other LDS veterans of VN or any of the Vietnamese LDS families who came here as refugees during the “boat evacuations” following the Fall of Saigon, please pass this information along to them.

(This) “heads up” (is) in case you need to make travel arrangements to attend.  It’ll certainly be worth it.  It will be held in the Harman Bldg.


 

on BYU campus.  It will be from 10 a.m. until 2:30 p.m. There will be a lunch and entertainment portion of the event. The tickets are $35.00 each, including the meal. This year’s Veteran’s day is 11/11/11!  Dr. Freeman is the point of contact for reservations or questions.

Virgil N. Kovalenko, Ph.D.
President, VASAA [Retired]
Veterans’ Association for Service Activities Abroad [Dislvd]
email  [email protected]
web:  https://www.vasaa.org
tel: 801-278-7496

 

Okay, Virgil, consider the news spread.

Now for the rest of you, I look forward to a shiny new topic next week.  Hope to see you then.

Until next time ? Kathy

“Blessed are the flexible, for they shall not be bent out of shape.”

 Author Unknown