Many of us fail to follow Christ in one very important way.
If I asked you to name one way we fail to follow our Lord and Savior, we could compile quite a list. None of us is perfect, as He was.
But many, who see themselves as otherwise diligent disciples, have a hard time allowing others to repent and move on. They retain a sharp memory of people’s mistakes and find it hard to see them in a new, improved version.
Have you ever come across an old acquaintance who only knew you as the smart aleck kid you were in junior high, or the “troubled youth” who was acting out because of a difficult home life? None of us (I hope) is as immature as we once were, or holds onto the silly behaviors of years gone by.
Ideally, we grow and repent. We regret our mistakes and allow Heavenly Father to help us become better people. But then someone dredges up the past. It reminds me of this quote by Elder Jeffrey R. Holland: “Let people repent. Let people grow. Believe that people can change and improve. Is that faith? Yes! Is that hope? Yes! Is it charity? Yes! Above all, it is charity, the pure love of Christ. If something is buried in the past, leave it buried. Don’t keep going back with your little sand pail and beach shovel to dig it up, wave it around, and then throw it at someone, saying, ‘Hey! Do you remember this?’ Splat!”
Why do we seem to enjoy throwing someone’s past at them? Does it make us appear more righteous, or serve to remind them that we know their little secrets? And is this behavior perhaps even worse than theirs was? Just as Satan might creep into our dreams and remind us of an ancient failing, these people seem to relish the chance to show us the rear-view mirror.
I’ve often wondered if this might have been a factor in Alma the Younger’s choice to leave his hometown and become a valiant missionary far away, miles from villagers who could say, “Wait—aren’t you the same guy who–”
I’ve always found butterflies fascinating. Moths, too. They start as caterpillars, but they don’t just create a chrysalis and then stay in there until they grow wings. It’s a complete transformation. The caterpillar digests its own body, and literally dissolves into a brown, soupy liquid. Hormones and stem cells are involved, but basically, this liquid creates an entirely new creature, which ultimately emerges with wings, of all things!
They’re the only animal that does this. And they do it in, dare I say, flying colors? Few things are as breathtaking and dazzling as a butterfly—an entirely new being with completely new behaviors. And isn’t that how repentance is? It makes you wonder if God gave us this particular insect, just as a reminder that we can make incredible changes, too.
The trick is to allow one another to grow, to become, to transform. No eye-rolling, no whispering, just smiles and applause. That’s how Jesus responded to every soul who repented. And to be like Him, we must do the same.
As a Seminary teacher, I help the students memorize 12 Doctrinal Mastery scriptures each semester. The latest grouping includes Doctrine and Covenants 64:9-11, which tells us the Lord will forgive whom He will forgive, but “of you it is required to forgive all men.”
We all want to make it home to our loving Father in Heaven, right? So we must cast aside our grudges like dried-up cocoons. And hope that others do the same for us.
As President Dieter F. Uchtdorf has said, “Remember, heaven is filled with those who have this in common: They are forgiven. And they forgive.”
Hilton’s novel, Golden, is now an Amazon audiobook. Her book, A Little Christmas Prayer, is perfect for Christmas– Sometimes it takes a child to raise a village, and this tale teaches anyone, of any faith, the magic of gratitude. All her books and YouTube Mom videos can be found at jonihilton.com.
