I suppose one might take issue with the statement, "The irony of pride is that those who are most talented are those who are most vulnerable to this leprosy of the soul." The core of pride is not necessarily thinking that one is better than others, but that one views one's self as the center of the universe (inward mindset). Those who suffer from poor self esteem are infected with a variant of pride that is particularly difficult to overcome because it is so powerfully self-reinforcing.
Some mistake poor self esteem as a manifestation of humility, but it is not. I cringe a little when I hear of this General Authority or that - including President Benson - speak of elevating others even a little higher than ourselves. This bit of overcompensation may be healthy for those who suffer from "better than thou" pride, but it is not a great approach for someone whose pride is of the self-loathing variety. The correct thing for all of us is to place God at the center of our universe, understand that we all are equally nothing without God, and develop an outward mindset.
LoriAugust 9, 2016
I love the insights you provide but my concerns about these principles echo those of the other comments. Do you have any training or knowledge about incorporating these in families where one of the spouses is suffering from a severe mental illness?
I have experienced and am trying to help others who are experiencing the chaos that comes from one spouse/parent whose words and actions do not just cause unhappiness, but actual physical or psychological danger to family members. At a certain point the usual response is to avoid all contact. I have lied to protect myself, something I could not have imagined doing prior to this. I actually am fighting a false theft charge from one mentally ill person. One of my family members had to give up her granddaughter to the state when there were family members ready to help raise her for fear of false claims this child might make.
Do the principles only work if there is already a floor to someone's bad behavior?
Betty RAugust 9, 2016
I too would like to know whether the principles taught are effective where one of the spouses suffers from mental illnesses severe enough to affect what one spouse remembers as having happened or believes quite literally that everything that takes place must be judged solely by how it affects their life and their life alone.
I have watched the difference between immaturity and selfishnessness that can be overcome and someone's complete inability to remember that he/she did horrible things to family members who no longer feel safe near them. The first marriages seem salvagable. The last seem to require an entirely different approach if they are to be saved. I would live to hear these issues addressed.
Ellen RAugust 8, 2016
I was married to a man who sufferred from borderline personality disorder. Will the ideas you teach work with the seriously mentally ill? Can a marriage be healed when one partner is actively attempting to destroy the quality of life of another? If so, how does this impact the children as they are exposed to the trauma of mental illness? I have watched this again and again in the lives of friends, watching the faith of the children be literally destroyed.
LauraAugust 8, 2016
This was exactly what I needed to hear today. I have been plagued with criticism for my companion, and a not-enough syndrome about myself. This helped me to continue in the path of turning to Christ and fixing my own failings, a message I have received often in prayer.
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PopsAugust 12, 2016
I suppose one might take issue with the statement, "The irony of pride is that those who are most talented are those who are most vulnerable to this leprosy of the soul." The core of pride is not necessarily thinking that one is better than others, but that one views one's self as the center of the universe (inward mindset). Those who suffer from poor self esteem are infected with a variant of pride that is particularly difficult to overcome because it is so powerfully self-reinforcing. Some mistake poor self esteem as a manifestation of humility, but it is not. I cringe a little when I hear of this General Authority or that - including President Benson - speak of elevating others even a little higher than ourselves. This bit of overcompensation may be healthy for those who suffer from "better than thou" pride, but it is not a great approach for someone whose pride is of the self-loathing variety. The correct thing for all of us is to place God at the center of our universe, understand that we all are equally nothing without God, and develop an outward mindset.
LoriAugust 9, 2016
I love the insights you provide but my concerns about these principles echo those of the other comments. Do you have any training or knowledge about incorporating these in families where one of the spouses is suffering from a severe mental illness? I have experienced and am trying to help others who are experiencing the chaos that comes from one spouse/parent whose words and actions do not just cause unhappiness, but actual physical or psychological danger to family members. At a certain point the usual response is to avoid all contact. I have lied to protect myself, something I could not have imagined doing prior to this. I actually am fighting a false theft charge from one mentally ill person. One of my family members had to give up her granddaughter to the state when there were family members ready to help raise her for fear of false claims this child might make. Do the principles only work if there is already a floor to someone's bad behavior?
Betty RAugust 9, 2016
I too would like to know whether the principles taught are effective where one of the spouses suffers from mental illnesses severe enough to affect what one spouse remembers as having happened or believes quite literally that everything that takes place must be judged solely by how it affects their life and their life alone. I have watched the difference between immaturity and selfishnessness that can be overcome and someone's complete inability to remember that he/she did horrible things to family members who no longer feel safe near them. The first marriages seem salvagable. The last seem to require an entirely different approach if they are to be saved. I would live to hear these issues addressed.
Ellen RAugust 8, 2016
I was married to a man who sufferred from borderline personality disorder. Will the ideas you teach work with the seriously mentally ill? Can a marriage be healed when one partner is actively attempting to destroy the quality of life of another? If so, how does this impact the children as they are exposed to the trauma of mental illness? I have watched this again and again in the lives of friends, watching the faith of the children be literally destroyed.
LauraAugust 8, 2016
This was exactly what I needed to hear today. I have been plagued with criticism for my companion, and a not-enough syndrome about myself. This helped me to continue in the path of turning to Christ and fixing my own failings, a message I have received often in prayer.
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