Parenting

School Shopping

Summer is winding down and my children are starting to say how much they are looking forward to school.  This is the week we’ll be heading to town to buy pencils, paper, notebooks and crayons.  We’ll be filling our cart with markers, glue, erasers and paint.  Of course we won’t stop there.  We have pants to find for legs that have somehow sprouted in the summer sun.  Shirts that seemed fine last spring have shrunk and must be replaced.  Sandaled feet have to be covered with new shoes for running on blacktop.  

It will be a busy week and as I look at the list of things I need to get I wonder if I can find the supplies I really want.  Do you think I could find something my children could put in their backpack that would infuse them with moral courage?  Is there a faith steadying something they could keep in their desk?  On a shelf, down an aisle can I find something for their locker that makes them remember who they really are, a child of God, precious and wonderful?  Are there special scissors that will help them cut through error and see the truth?  As I send my children out into the world again I want supplies like these more than any others.

The reality is that there are things I can give my children that will help them in these ways.  Things that will strengthen faith, help them have moral courage, know who they are and cut to the truth.  They won’t fit in pencil boxes, backpacks or lockers.  They will fit in their hearts and that is even better.

Prayer

President Henry B. Eyring has said “when the children are away from home and family, prayer can pro-vide the shield of protection the parent will want so much for them to have, (Ensign, Aug. 2009, 2-7)

Who knows how many children have been protected by the prayers of loving parents? I know I have.  I remember an evening as a college student when I found myself in a situation I hadn’t planned on.  Somehow I found the courage and strength to get myself out of there and to my car.  As I sat in the car feeling relief that it was over, I had the distinct impression that my parents had been praying for me.  I was living at home at the time and when I let myself into the house that night, I found them awake and waiting for me.  Somehow they had known that I needed a little extra spiritual protection that night.  I’m sure their prayers saved me that night and many others I never knew about.  

Our prayers with our children, for our children and our encouragement for them to seek the Lord them-selves will serve as an insulation to them in moments of danger or temptation.  It will turn their hearts to their Father in Heaven and help them feel His spirit.  It is worth whatever efforts we make to instill the habit of daily prayer in our homes.

The Word of God

The scriptures remind us that “whoesoever will may lay hold upon the word of God which is quick and powerful, which shall divide asunder all the cunning and the snares and the wiles of the devil (Helaman 3:29)  If I’m looking for something to help my children cut through deception there is nothing like the word of God.  

In Lehi’s dream it was the iron rod, the word of God, that led Nephi, Sam and Sariah safely to Lehi’s side, safely to the tree of life.  Safety for our children is found in surrounding them and directing them to the scriptures.  Elder D. Todd Christofferson tells us that, “God uses scripture to unmask erroneous thinking, false traditions, and sin with its devastating effects.  He is a tender parent who would spare us needless suffering and grief and at the same time help us realize our divine potential (Ensign, May 2010, 33-34).”  That’s exactly what I’m looking for.

Testimony

About a year ago I was reading the story of the stripling warriors again.  When I came to the verses about their mothers I was struck by something I’d never noticed before.  “They had been taught by their mothers that if they did not doubt, God would deliver them.  And they rehearsed unto me the words of their mothers, saying: We do not doubt our mothers knew it (Alma 56:47-48).

”  I had always thought there was a comma between “We do not doubt” and “our mothers knew it.”  I thought they had been saying that they didn’t doubt because their mothers knew it.  Instead they were saying they didn’t doubt that their mothers knew it.  

Perhaps those young men did know for themselves, but if they didn’t they were confident enough in the faith their mothers had to trust in their words.  All day long our children will hear the beliefs of the people around them; their teachers, their friends, the media.  Do they know what we believe?  Do they know it so surely that it will keep them from falling?  Can they lean on our faith until theirs is firm?

Elder David A. Bednar told us, “Feeling the power, the edification and the constancy of testimony from a spouse, a parent, or a child is a rich blessing.  Such testimony fortifies faith and provides direction.  Such testimony generates light in a world that grows increasingly dark (Ensign, November 2009, 19).”

Love

When I was a little girl I had a style all my own.  I didn’t follow any kind of fashion guide.  I just knew what I liked and what I didn’t like.  One of the things I didn’t like was the pair of ugly brown rubber boots I was given to wear.  I couldn’t bear to wear such awful things.  One cold, wet day I fought with my mother and ran out the door to school without the boots.  Before I reached my neighbor’s gate she caught me and sent me home.  Once there my mother had me get in the car and we went shopping.  She found me the most beautiful boots I’d ever seen.  I was deliriously happy and I wore those boots until June.  

Now I’m not saying that we give in to all our children’s whims or that we buy them things to show love, but I have to believe that what my mother did that day was inspired by love and I felt it.  I was clothed in that love and it warmed me.  We can wrap our children in our love by listening, really listening. with our hearts to what they are saying.  We can strengthen them to face their challenges by letting them hear of our love and confidence in them.  We can believe in them, trust in their goodness and remember who they are.  In so doing we can encircle them in our love.  Our love may sustain them on those days when they feel unloved by those around them, on those days when they can’t find much to love about themselves.

Work

Work is a blessing for our children.  It gives them the opportunity to be part of something bigger than themselves.  They get to contribute and make a difference in the lives of the people closest to them.  Bishop H. David Burton said, “Fewer and fewer parents ask their children to do chores around the house because they think they are already overwhelmed by social and academic pressures.  But children devoid of responsibilities risk never learning that every individual can be of service and that life has meaning beyond their own happiness (Ensign, November 2004).”

Learning to work helps to develop discipline and perseverance.  When our children are faced with difficult situations we want them to know that they can handle hard things.  Work gives them experience with doing difficult things in order to reach a desired end.  Most importantly work blesses our children spiritually.  

“One way we can arm our girls (and boys) spiritually is to help them develop temporal skills and talents.  We know that to the Lord all things are spiritual. . .So we must teach homemaking skills, including practical ones such as cooking, sewing, budgeting and beautifying.  We must let young women (and young men) know that homemaking skills are honorable and can help them spiritually as well as temporally, (Susan W. Tanner, Ensign, June 2005).”

Must Haves

I have not spent a lot of time following the latest must haves for school this year.  I’m sure there are many I’d like to have for my crew.  But the must haves that I truly must have are the ones that don’t cost me a dime.  They are the simple things I do every day.  Like supplies that help my children succeed in the work they do academically these things will help them in the spiritual battles they face each day.

Kimberli Robison has a degree in Family and Human Development, but all practical knowledge on the subject has been gleaned as a wife to her sweetheart and a mother to their six children.