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Contention, jealousy, and feelings of resentment will injure the cohesiveness of a family. If your family is needing a little “pickup” of family cohesion, it may be time for a “Basketball” Pickup Game…Wastebasket Style. Time for some FHE Fun!
Opening Song. Hymn #335, Brightly Beams Our Father’s Mercy
Opening Prayer. By invitation.
Time to Celebrate. What happy moments did your loved ones have this past week? You might take one or two minutes at the beginning of each FHE to celebrate successes. This way your children will notice they do have strength sufficient to face challenges and to serve others.
Emergency Prep Minute. Just a little bit of weekly preparation can empower your children as they mature. What emergency tip could you share or work on with your family this week?
Favorite Scripture Time. When kids and adults share favorite verses or scripture stories, they help each other find joy in scripture reading. You could include a few moments at the beginning of each FHE to share any new “favorite” scriptures found the previous week. This brief devotional also helps bring the Spirit and helps settle the children for the lesson.
Activity. We offer a suggested FHE activity, but do feel free to choose what you feel is most suited to your family’s needs this week. And if you have young children, feel free to adapt. Enjoy this weekly time with your loved ones!
Items Needed.
- Clean wastebasket
- Long piece of string
- Beanbag, ball, or softball-sized wad of paper
- Piece of paper and a pen or pencil
- Scriptures
Before beginning the game, you may want to read the following quote from the LDS.org website under the topic of “Love”:
“Love is a feeling of deep devotion, concern, and affection. The greatest example of God’s love for His children is found in the infinite Atonement of Jesus Christ. Love for God and fellow men is a characteristic of disciples of Jesus Christ.”
Ask if anyone has ever experienced the opposite of that statement, especially during a competition? What did it feel like? Yet what does God hope for His children to experience? Have the family members ponder how kindness builds bonds rather than destroy. Invite your family to be looking for feelings of the Spirit that come when they share kindness.
Once the discussion has finished, let the family know you have a game to play that hopefully illustrates the benefit of supporting one another, no matter whether people are successful in the activity or not.
Explanation and Points for “Wastebasket Basketball Pickup Game”*:
Place a wastebasket at one end of the room. At an age-appropriate distance from the wastebasket, stretch out the string as a “throw” line. Have family members line up behind the throw-line. Explain the following rules before beginning.
Rules. The goal is to see how many points the family can rack up as one team (no competition) within three rounds. Here are the rounds:
- Round 1. Each person will take a turn, getting one chance to make a basket and score a point.
- Round 2. You then will move the throw-line farther away by 12″ and allow each family member one additional chance to make a basket.
- Round 3. You then will move the throw-line farther away by 12 ” and allow each family member one last chance to make a basket.
Here is the difference between this game and the way the world normally plays competitive sports. While it is true that each basket does score a point for the family’s overall team score, each time the family cheers in support – WHETHER OR NOT a basket is made – the family receives 5 extra points added to the family’s overall team score.
Application:
Once the game is finished and the score is tallied, here are some possible points of discussion. You may want to appoint a scribe to record the ideas shared:
- What does this quote from President Eyring mean to you: “All of us want happiness for those we love, and we want as little pain for them as possible.”
- The Savior has taught that if we are not one, we essentially are not his. What does this mean? How does that apply to the game we just played?
- What does it feel like when people cheer for you, even if you’re not immediately successful in your activity?
- What happens to a family when criticism or sarcasm is the main focus? What happens to a family when kind comments are given, even when success is still a distance away and “failure” has just happened?
- What can our family do to be more supportive of each other?
After hearing your family’s comments – without responding – you may want to have the family select one goal for the week that can help your family express supportive comments, even during times of discouragement.
“We manifest our love for Heavenly Father by keeping His commandments and serving His children. Our expressions of love for others may include being kind to them, listening to them, mourning with them, comforting them, serving them, praying for them, sharing the gospel with them, and being their friend.
“Our love for those around us increases when we remember that we are all children of God—that we are spirit brothers and sisters. The love that results from this realization has the power to transcend all boundaries of nation, creed, and color.”
You may want to end by sharing one thing you appreciate about each family member.
Closing Song. Children’s Songbook: “A Special Gift is Kindness,” p. 145
Closing Prayer. By invitation.
Refreshments. A fun refreshment could be popping a large bowl of popcorn. Sit around the kitchen table and for every kernel of popcorn eaten, a sweet mention of admiration about another family member could be given!
ADDITIONAL RESOURCE
President Henry B. Eyring, First Presidency Message: “Happiness for Those We Love,” Ensign, January 2016
FOOD FOR THOUGHT
A family’s finest hour is when it stands united. As parents, it is imperative we gently offer a steady beacon of love and guidance, so that our children will want to be part of that unified family unit. When we build upon the gospel of Jesus Christ, as parents seeking to obey His commandments with exactness and integrity, He will aid us in building an eternal family.
In fact, one of the family’s finest hours each week could very well be during Family Home Evening. Put all those “finest hours” together and you have created a powerful family — one that lasts unitedly throughout the eternities!
*A variation on the game “Wastebasket Toss” from The LDS Game Book, by Alma Heaton.
C.S. Bezas obtained her Bachelor’s degree in Communications with an emphasis in training programs and human resource development. She earned her Master’s in Adult/Organizational Learning and Leadership with a focus on using transformative learning in dealing with life’s challenges. She is the author of Powerful Tips for Powerful Teachers and the creator of soothing-music found at CSBezasMusic.com. She and her husband have four children.
