Wonderful! I have found this to be true in my own life, and I try to teach others about it as often as I can. To add to the understanding of how to choose NOT to suffer, read Stephen Covey's discussion about Habit 2: Being Proactive, in The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. Basically he says that there is a space between stimulus and response in which we can choose our response. We can choose to have our suffering swallowed up in the joy of Christ. I add my witness to Anne's that this is true!
JoniJune 17, 2015
Bravo! Have you read Eckhart Tolle's books? If not, you would love them--he teaches the same things as you share in your excellent article. I would recommend starting with, The Power of Now.
KathrynJune 17, 2015
Thanks so much for this insightful article! The path through grief and pain is rarely simple, but I believe,as you said, that we have more control over our feelings than we often realize.
One as I faced a devastating loss that changed the whole course of my life, I was crying to the Lord in deep pain. It was hard to imagine how I could ever be whole or happy again.
The thought clearly came into my mind, "If you trusted the Lord more, you would not be in so much pain." What a valuable insight. Trust in the Lord and righteous use of our moral agency to choose our own emotions--what a potent combination in overcoming the trials of this life!
Janet G.June 16, 2015
I just posted my experience with this, but should add a P.S. and it is : Forgiveness, which we are commanded to give to those who hurt us, is much easier to do when we put it all at the Lord's feet. As I said, when someone deliberately hurts us, it is their problem, not ours.
When I drop it at His feet, it is between them and the Lord. Let it go.
Janet G.June 16, 2015
This is wonderful, thank you for putting it so clearly. I learned from the Spirit after a heartbreaking experience that when someone does something unkind or even cruel, that they are not really doing it to me, they are doing it to themselves. It only affects me if I allow it to, but unless the person repents (which is between them and the Lord, not me) they will have to account for their actions when they stand before the Lord someday.
I can still be filled with joy and happiness when I choose not to let bad things into my life and heart, but instead hand it over to the Lord, dropping my burden at His feet, as He has told us to, and it will be gone. It is the perpetrator's problem now, not mine. I can find joy and peace knowing that the Lord has loved me enough to take it from me by the power of His Infinite Atonement. His love is never failing.
KeriJune 16, 2015
Thank you for bringing such insight and clarity to this repetitive cycle of suffering and self-pity we often find ourselves in and providing a way to "stop the insanity!" As a Life Coach, I use and recommend a similar formula with my clients. However, I am excited to be able to incorporate this additional valuable resource. Thank you for sharing your work. I'm looking forward to Part II!
A MotherJune 16, 2015
Thank you - I have needed this as I have been suffering through one child's decisions. My heart is broken and I need to heal - it is pushing her further away to see me so heartbroken. This gives me strength again to stop suffering and just to love her regardless.
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Lorena HolmsteadJune 20, 2015
Wonderful! I have found this to be true in my own life, and I try to teach others about it as often as I can. To add to the understanding of how to choose NOT to suffer, read Stephen Covey's discussion about Habit 2: Being Proactive, in The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. Basically he says that there is a space between stimulus and response in which we can choose our response. We can choose to have our suffering swallowed up in the joy of Christ. I add my witness to Anne's that this is true!
JoniJune 17, 2015
Bravo! Have you read Eckhart Tolle's books? If not, you would love them--he teaches the same things as you share in your excellent article. I would recommend starting with, The Power of Now.
KathrynJune 17, 2015
Thanks so much for this insightful article! The path through grief and pain is rarely simple, but I believe,as you said, that we have more control over our feelings than we often realize. One as I faced a devastating loss that changed the whole course of my life, I was crying to the Lord in deep pain. It was hard to imagine how I could ever be whole or happy again. The thought clearly came into my mind, "If you trusted the Lord more, you would not be in so much pain." What a valuable insight. Trust in the Lord and righteous use of our moral agency to choose our own emotions--what a potent combination in overcoming the trials of this life!
Janet G.June 16, 2015
I just posted my experience with this, but should add a P.S. and it is : Forgiveness, which we are commanded to give to those who hurt us, is much easier to do when we put it all at the Lord's feet. As I said, when someone deliberately hurts us, it is their problem, not ours. When I drop it at His feet, it is between them and the Lord. Let it go.
Janet G.June 16, 2015
This is wonderful, thank you for putting it so clearly. I learned from the Spirit after a heartbreaking experience that when someone does something unkind or even cruel, that they are not really doing it to me, they are doing it to themselves. It only affects me if I allow it to, but unless the person repents (which is between them and the Lord, not me) they will have to account for their actions when they stand before the Lord someday. I can still be filled with joy and happiness when I choose not to let bad things into my life and heart, but instead hand it over to the Lord, dropping my burden at His feet, as He has told us to, and it will be gone. It is the perpetrator's problem now, not mine. I can find joy and peace knowing that the Lord has loved me enough to take it from me by the power of His Infinite Atonement. His love is never failing.
KeriJune 16, 2015
Thank you for bringing such insight and clarity to this repetitive cycle of suffering and self-pity we often find ourselves in and providing a way to "stop the insanity!" As a Life Coach, I use and recommend a similar formula with my clients. However, I am excited to be able to incorporate this additional valuable resource. Thank you for sharing your work. I'm looking forward to Part II!
A MotherJune 16, 2015
Thank you - I have needed this as I have been suffering through one child's decisions. My heart is broken and I need to heal - it is pushing her further away to see me so heartbroken. This gives me strength again to stop suffering and just to love her regardless.
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