A disclaimer: As a lifelong Beatles fan, whenever people talk about John and Paul, my first thought is about Lennon and McCartney. But today I’d like to focus on the “other” John and Paul. The New Testament version. It doesn’t say anything in the Bible about John or Paul being singers or songwriters. But then again, it doesn’t say they couldn’t have been. I bring this up, only because as I write this I’m having a Mission2BHappy moment. I’m smiling at the thought of the ancient John or Paul introducing a brand new tune at one of their Middle East mission conferences. I promise, I’m not being irreverent. But just thinking this helps me feel closer to them somehow.
If, however, this thought is freaking you out, I acknowledge freely that my M2BHappy thoughts about faith and depression may not be for everyone.
But I digress. Where was I? Oh yes, The New Testament. I love that book and as I read it I notice that Paul in particular has something important to tell us about faith. Since a significant amount of faith is essential for a Mission 2BHappy to bless my life, I’ll liken what Paul said way back when to the moments way right now. I’ll focus on this:
Heb. 11:1. Faith is the substance (assurance) of things hoped for, the evidence (proof) of things unseen.
Here’s my M2BHappy thought about faith. Sacred texts tell us that asking God for “signs” can be a dangerous and hurtful thing…BUT COME ON, People….WE GOTTA GET SOMETHING, SOMETIME or we’ll quit having faith!! In the Gospel according to John there’s a passage where a man asks Jesus to come and heal his son, lest he die. “Then said Jesus unto him, Except ye see signs and wonders, ye will not believe. The nobleman saith unto him, Sir, come down ere my child die. Jesus saith unto him, Go thy way; thy son liveth. And the man believed the word that Jesus had spoken unto him and went his way. And as he was now going down his servants met him, and told him, saying Thy son liveth. Then enquired he of them the hour when he began to amend. And they said unto him, Yesterday at the seventh hour the fever left him. So the father knew that it was at the same hour, in the which Jesus said unto him, Thy son liveth and himself believed and his whole house” (John 4: 49-53)
From my reading of the text I don’t see a “wicked and adulterous” man seeking signs.I see a man needing help. He had hope and believed but didn’t know in advance how it was all going to turn out. I get the sense that the father with a sick child had enough faith and hope to approach Jesus with a deeply felt need.
I trust that God is way smarter at knowing how to nurture our faith than we are, so whining and moaning about needing a faith-promoting moment isn’t what I’m talking about. But on my mission to be happy I’m giving myself permission (and encouragement) to speak candidly in my prayers about what I’m struggling with and asking for the GIFT that faith is. I’m hanging on, but I need a boost…PLEASE! I acknowledge that faith is a precious thing, and it can also be a fragile thing. So on a Mission2BHappy I’m inviting myself to pray in the language of joy and honestly tell a loving heavenly parent that I’d appreciate a little something, sometime, somewhere giving me just enough to keep this up, so our next prayer I won’t need a sign.
And along with this prayer, I’m prepared for the possibility that expecting the faith-building moments can and often come in UNEXPECTED ways, UNEXPECTED TIMES and UNEXPECTED PLACES.
I learned this from my lifelong battle with depression. For years and years I kept praying for the Lord to heal me and then being upset that He wouldn’t do it the way I wanted, when I wanted. I wrote a song about it called PILLS. The song reminds me that my preconceived notions about how the Lord operates when it comes to healing His children lacked the kind of FAITH that got me to the clinic, the therapist, and the pharmacy, where I could discover all that God had already done to help me. I guess on a M2BHappy, it’s a good idea to be humble enough to see life from a point of view far less limited than your own.
A little note about the PILLS song: getting the song written was a real challenge for me. With each attempt, I struggled to capture what this middle-aged, clinically depressed, type 2 diabetic needed to hear. Too many of the songs I tried to write sounded way too much like every other song I’ve written to help me get through the dark and difficult times. But the one that finally found its way into my heart turned out to be a surprisingly upbeat, toe-tapping self-deprecating yet fun exploration of something that I take very seriously: my dependence on heavenly help to get through each and every moment of each and every day.
Look, I’m dependent on pills and on insulin and doctors and a daily regimen but mostly I’m dependent on a Higher Power; a kind, wise Heavenly Friend who I believe wants my Mission2BHappy to be a success. And I’m asking everyday for just enough help to get me through.
For those of you who may suffer from some of my same afflictions, I’m confessing that I got discouraged when I realized that it had taken me soooooo long to begin figuring this stuff out. And, as we all know, there’s nothing in Satan’s arsenal quite as effective as discouragement to keep us from finding the happiness that can enrich each day. So when I find myself slipping over to the dark side, I turn up a couple of songs REAL LOUD and when they’re done, I’m smiling again. I’m hoping you’ll take a few moments and check the songs out. They’re called PILLS and I DON’T NEED A SIGN
PILLS
Something’s broken in my brain
And only pills can fix it
I fought this thing for years in vain
Believing I could lick it
I tried and failed and felt so weak It made me quite the cynic
And then I heard heaven speak “Hey, get thee to a clinic”
I thought that meant the clinic
For my own immortal soul
So I trudged down to a church to wait
For a miracle to make me whole
Then something happened that came as quite a shocker
A voice from up Above said “I meant get thee to a doctor”
Hey son, you need pills
They can’t cure all your ills,
I know you pray it’ll change but the truth is still
Sonny, you need pills
I said “But You’re the Power of heaven and earth,
Creator, King and Master
Why not just heal me here and now?
It’s cheaper and it’s faster”
He paused so long I thought He’d gone then added this to my story
“There’s no shame in a broken brain so don’t be self-incriminatory”
CHORUS: Hey son, you need pills
They can’t cure all your ills,
I know you pray it’ll change and it probably will
If you’ll just take your pills
He told me “Guess who guided scientists to understand what’s wrong
With you and come up with some medicines so you can carry on?
You see, I know you wonder if I hear
Your prayers when you say them
Well I’ve truly heard your cries for help
Long before you pray them”
Trust me, you need pills
They can’t cure all your ills
I know you pray it’ll change, and my advice is still
Sonny, take your pills
I DON’T NEED A SIGN THIS TIME
Faith is the substance of things hoped for
And the evidence of things not seen
I’ve read it a thousand times or more
But I’m still figuring out what it means
I’ve heard the warnings
About asking for signs, well
I DON’T NEED A SIGN THIS TIME
I’M TAKING IT ON FAITH
I DON’T NEED A SIGN THIS TIME
BUT I’D APPRECIATE
A LITTLE SOMETHING SOMETIME SOMEWHERE
GIVIN’ ME JUST ENOUGH TO KEEP IT UP SO MY NEXT PRAYER
I WON’T NEED A SIGN
Faith is the substance of things hoped for
And the evidence of things not seen
It is a truth I can’t ignore
But I’m still figuring out what it means
Can one be faithful
And need a witness too?
I DON’T NEED A SIGN THIS TIME
I’M TAKING IT ON FAITH
I DON’T NEED A SIGN THIS TIME
BUT I’D APPRECIATE
SOMETHING SMALL SOMETHING SOMETIME SOMEWHERE
GIVIN’ ME JUST ENOUGH TO KEEP IT UP SO MY NEXT PRAYER
I WON’T NEED A SIGN
.
