The boys hated dance days. Once a month (twice during the winter), the boys had to dance during p.e. With girls. The boys hated dance days.

Today they were ushered into the gym as usual, and they waited. The girls always got to the gym after the boys. The boys would arrive first, and then, after the gym teachers had secured the perimeter, the girls were ushered into the room. Today, the girls were unusually late.

It turned out that the teachers weren’t waiting for the girls at all, but for Mr. Stiles, the vice principal, who arrived about 5 minutes after the boys. The boys were restless, and when they realized they were getting Stiles rather than the girls, they were disappointed. They didn’t like dancing with the girls, but they did find the girls fascinating. Stiles held no fascination whatsoever. He was the disciplinarian and the least-liked adult on campus.

Mr. Stiles entered the gym and strode to the center of the room. “The girls are not coming,” he said. The boys clapped and cheered. They supposed that the basketballs were about to be liberated. They were wrong.

“Today,” continued Stiles, “we’re having dance day, but without the girls. This is in keeping with our policy of inclusion and tolerance. Our administration believes that you must learn to dance with other boys. In the multipurpose room, the girls are learning to slow-dance with other girls.”

Somebody shouted out, “Do we have to do this?”

Stiles turned on the boys. “Who said that?” Nobody answered, but nobody had to. “Dominick, you will report to my office after this period. Mr. Lerner, you will send a note with Dominick telling me whether this boy participated in today’s dance, and whether he did so willingly. You will report any additional indications of homophobia.”

Stiles turned back to Dominick. “Any questions?”


“Do any of you other boys want to join Dominick in my office?” There were only mumbles and head shaking.

“Good. Now, line up, please, and count off by twos. We will start by having the ones’ dance with the twos.'”

One of the teachers approached Mr. Stiles and whispered to him. “Quite right, quite right,” said Stiles. “I have just been reminded that counting by ones and twos may make some of you feel like second-class citizens. We want all of you to know that twos’ are just as valued as ones,’ but to avoid any chance of misunderstanding we will instead count off by lions’ and tigers.’ So, Michael, you’re a lion, and DeShawn you’re a tiger, and then Remick is the next lion, and so on. Lions’ will dance with tigers.'”

“I have a meeting,” continued Mr. Stiles. “Mr. Lerner will be in charge after I leave. He is, as you know, a proud gay man.” Stiles looked around the room one final time, threateningly, and left.

Mr. Lerner beckoned to one of the younger boys. “Okay,” he said, “now we need the next tiger.”

The boy was guileless. He had no idea that males danced with males. He was just starting to comprehend the idea that he, himself, might want to dance with a girl sometime in the far distant future. He loved animals and read about them, and some day he hoped to become a vet. Without forethought or malice he simply said, “Mr. Lerner, aren’t tigers endangered?”

Forty-five minutes later, he and Dominick and a few others were holding notes from Mr. Lerner and sitting in the vice principal’s office. Stiles was considering the best way to punish and re-educate the boys. He didn’t think he would have much problem with most of the boys, they were malleable and a video lecture from Lady Gaga might be enough, but he had to consider how best to avoid those pesky parents and religion freaks.


Mr. Oliphant is a lawyer who lives in Virginia. He is writing a book on homosexualism, which is the political doctrine and dogma of the gay rights movement. The story printed here, which so far as he can tell hasn’t happened yet, is an example of homosexualism at work. Do not suppose that the story is fantastic and unbelievable. It is, to the contrary, probable. If the events depicted in the story were to happen tomorrow in California, they would be said to be in harmony with, and required by, that State’s new laws about teaching gay rights in the schools. The homosexualists would rise to the defense of the same-sex dance classes, and they would accuse their opponents of being narrow-minded, intolerant, and bigoted – and the media would play it that way.