Right? Somewhere along the way I got the idea that worrying about my kids made me a good mom. Because only neglectful parents walk around blissfully content, right?
I finally learned that worry gives me three things I don’t want:
1. sleep deprivation,
2. a whole lot of fear, and
3. worrying makes my kids feel like there’s something wrong with them— they are someone to be worried about.
I went on a worry-free diet last year. I haven’t exactly reached the blissfully content stage where I’m skipping along and never worry about my kids. And I don’t expect that I’ll ever be like that. I don’t even want to.
But I’ve started to notice worry. I use it as a stop sign in my life. When worry comes up, I stop, analyze it and look for solutions.
Make worry a stop sign for you. A turning point. Not the place where you spend your time. Worry forms a negative feedback loop in your brain and if you stay there, your brain will create more and more negative pathways. You don’t want to be stuck. Your kids don’t want you to obsessively worry. They need your brilliant solutions.
I have so much faith in you. I have so much faith in your teens. You’ve got this.