How do we find inner peace? Where does it come from? How do we maintain peace in a world of political strife, armed aggression, marital conflict, online insults, and rainy days? What??? – rainy days !?! Well, not every day is blue skies, sunshine, and fireworks. And not every comment, interaction, or relationship is uplifting, edifying, and strengthening.
Here are eight tips to find personal peace:
- Go along to get along. If this sounds like a pretty passive approach, consider this. If someone attempts to insult me, I can simply agree with them. For example, “your tie is really ugly.” Me: “That tie is ugly and you should see the tie I have at home that is even uglier!” This approach takes the heat out of their comment. It takes away the sting.
- Be not offended where no offense is intended. Or be not offended where offense is intended. Otherwise, didn’t I just give them power over my emotions. I can put on the breastplate of righteousness to quench the fiery darts of the adversary. [Note: make sure it’s not the breastplate of self-righteousness.]
- Seek understanding. “That sounds like something important to you. Please help me understand better.” Maybe that person is just having a bad day. Maybe they are feeling vulnerable and are attacking as a form of self-protection against their own negative feelings.
- Find the truth. Whatever their comment or criticism, seek a kernel of truth and learn what you can do better and how you can be better.
- Change what you can and turn the rest over to the Lord.
- Set healthy boundaries. Make sure you are safe physically.
- Use charity as an antidote to contention. Let them know you care and listen carefully so they know it. It does not mean you agree with or condone bad behavior, but it does mean you care for them as a person.
- Become a peacemaker. In the April 2023 General Conference, President Russell M. Nelson taught the following:
“Brothers and sisters, the pure love of Christ is the answer to the contention that ails us today. Charity propels us “to bear one another’s burdens” rather than heap burdens upon each other. The pure love of Christ allows us “to stand as witnesses of God at all times and in all things”—especially in tense situations. Charity allows us to demonstrate how men and women of Christ speak and act—especially when under fire.”
“Now, I am not talking about “peace at any price.” I am talking about treating others in ways that are consistent with keeping the covenant you make when you partake of the sacrament. You covenant to always remember the Savior. In situations that are highly charged and filled with contention, I invite you to remember Jesus Christ. Pray to have the courage and wisdom to say or do what He would. As we follow the Prince of Peace, we will become His peacemakers.”
May the Lord bless us to seek and find and share the peace through Christ that passeth all understanding.
