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The following was written by Jonathan Decker and is excerpted from LDS Living. To read the full article, CLICK HERE.
Q: In God’s eyes, what’s appropriate (and not appropriate) in the marriage bedroom?
A: I love this question. So many of us have asked it, because we want to enjoy sexual intimacy in marriage as ordained by God but we are also like Alma, who “feared that he should do wrong in the sight of the Lord” (Mosiah 26:13). The gospel of Jesus Christ teaches us that sex is meant to be holy, beautiful, and unifying within the bonds of matrimony. It is not wrong in and of itself (quite the opposite, in fact), but the adversary attempts to confuse love with lust in order to draw us away from God.
As President Spencer W. Kimball taught: “In the context of lawful marriage, the intimacy of sexual relations is right and divinely approved. There is nothing unholy or degrading about sexuality in itself, for by that means men and women join in a process of creation and in an expression of love” (President Kimball Speaks Out, 2).
But how can we tell when we’ve crossed the line from love into lust? What’s the difference between enjoying each other and using each other? Are certain behaviors categorically off-limits? Have the Savior’s servants given us clear instruction and guidelines?
The fact is, while a few attempts have been made decades ago to categorize specific bedroom behaviors as right or wrong, our leaders have backed away from that and there is nothing that has been officially declared “off-limits.” But that doesn’t mean that anything goes. It merely means that Church leaders likely don’t want to put themselves in a position of creating hard, fast rules for everyone, only for Church members to pressure their spouses with “See? No one’s said we can’t, so it must be okay, and you need to loosen up and do it!”
We do not live in the age of the law of Moses, an age of “carnal commandments” (D&C 84:27, Hebrews 7:16) with everything spelled out for us down to the letter. God does not wish to “command us in all things” (see D&C 58:26). In matters of married sexuality, as in so many others, the Lord through His prophets teaches us correct principles, then lets us govern ourselves.
So what are the correct principles regarding married sexuality? What is and isn’t appropriate? Unsurprisingly, God’s views diverge from modern, secular schools of thought. “For,” said He, “my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways” (Isaiah 55:8). Let’s take a look at 5 correct principles revealed through God’s prophets and apostles.
To read the full article, CLICK HERE.