It can be the best or the worst of times – just ask any mother whose children are on an extended break from school.

Consider this worst case scenario: The house is full of bored, restless, irritable children. They’re indulging in too many snacks, watching too much TV, and playing too many computer games. And when they’re tired of the above, they find fun in “bugging” their siblings and driving Mom crazy.

Now, how about a best case scenario: You as the parent have instigated a “Build a Better Kid” summer point program. (See The Ultimate Career, p. 94-5) You have offered your children incentives for developing talents, serving others, or mastering something that has been difficult such as learning the times tables, leading music, swimming laps, or learning to knit or crochet. In other words, you have encouraged and motivated your children to set and reach goals and embark on their own personal self-improvement program. You have also added some structure in the home to support this and help make it happen.

Summer now becomes a time of fun and learning, with activities and projects set up to help family members learn and grow in a relaxed atmosphere. Beware, however, of over-programming your children. Actually, there should be some down time for everyone in the family. After all, “It’s summertime and the livin’ is easy.” (Porgy and Bess by George and Ira Gershwin) At least it should be easier. It does a child’s soul good to lie on the lawn on a sultry summer day and watch the clouds roll by, or sleep outdoors on a starry night, or sit on a porch and watch the raindrops dance on the street during an August downpour. In planning for the summer the “Goldilocks Theory” applies – not too much, not too little, but just right.

Even though the schedule should be somewhat relaxed, the household should not fall apart and it’s not helpful if children get into slothful habits. So, after they’ve put their rooms in order and done their chores, let the projects begin. Following are some suggestions:

• Encourage children to read good books by letting them cut a circle from colored construction paper for each book read and tape the circles together to form a bookworm. String it across a mirror or wall in their rooms. Of course, there could be some type of recognition or reward at the end of the summer for books read, depending on the length of the bookworm. For excellent reading lists for children, consult Holly E. Newton, Meridian Magazine columnist. (Click on her name under “Columnists,” left sidebar of page). Also, the May 2006 issue of The Friend has a two-page spread on summer reading, beginning on page 22.

• Teach skills to help children become self-reliant adults by involving them in meal preparation, teaching them to sew on a button or repair a hem, showing them how to iron a shirt, and teaching them how to do simple repairs such as patch a leaky bicycle tire or repair a broken bicycle chain.

• Set up home scrapbooking and craft projects of various types. Some ideas include a scrapbook of the previous school year; a themed scrapbook based on their talents, hobbies or interests; a shadowbox of special items or collections; a scrapbook based on “My Favorites” and filled with pictures of things that are special to them right now; or writing and illustrating a summer vacation scrapbook for your family. Compiling a family newsletter can be a much appreciated activity. Our family has enjoyed one that we’ve distributed periodically entitled, “The Hoole Street Journal.”

• Plant and cultivate a garden. Children love planting sunflowers, strawberries, tomatoes, and pumpkins. Berries can be harvested and used with vanilla yogurt, juice and ice to make homemade smoothies. Make a pizza garden by planting herbs and cherry tomatoes, and then using them for a homemade pizza night. Share the surplus with friends, neighbors, or a charitable organization.

• Help your children become involved in a service project – making sandwiches for the soup kitchen, crocheting caps for the homeless shelter, or volunteering at the local zoo. Even sharing extra toys and clothes by donating to the local thrift stores such as Deseret Industries can create charitable feelings in children.

• Plan ways to help older children earn extra spending money and even help pay for camps and teams.

• For example, Abby and Aliza, both age13, invited neighborhood children to their home two afternoons a week for a cooking school. As part of the school, the girls helped them prepare a dish (entre or dessert) for each family’s dinner that evening. At the end of the summer, Abby and Aliza copied and compiled the recipes into a booklet and sold it to family and friends. This money plus the nominal fee they had charged for the cooking classes went toward school clothes.

• Christian, age 12, excelled in basketball and enjoyed attending summer camps. He earned extra money by holding a summer basketball camp for younger neighborhood children, teaching them basic skills and good sportsmanship. His computer skills were enhanced by learning how to make business cards and flyers, camp certificates, and printing a digital photo of each camper at the end.

• Encourage children to work on Faith in God activities, Cub Scout badges, Scout merit badges, or Duty to God and Personal Progress goals. These inspired church and church-sponsored programs are effective tools for personal growth in our children, as well as in our families. In fact, if you are stumped for good Family Home Evening ideas, take a quick glance through the manuals related to these activities for lots of helpful lessons your children and teens can teach. Using these guidelines in setting summer goals is a great idea.

• Help a budding cinematographer make a family summer movie. Writing a script, putting together scenes, making simple costumes and props are fun and creative ways to spend a summer. One summer, our extended family of cousins made a movie that started on the east coast and finished on the west coast, thanks to a family reunion. The happy participants thanked the moms involved with a personal note at the end of the film.

• Have a Family Fitness Challenge. Each family member sets a personal fitness goal for the summer, whether it’s running a 5k, a marathon, or just walking for 20 minutes every morning. Have a chart in the kitchen where each person can mark their accomplishments. At the end of the summer, plan a day to celebrate each person’s goal.

• Help children make and sell dog biscuits. For the enterprising child, this is a profitable alternative to a punch stand. Combine it with a weekly dog walk, and lots of dog owners (and their dogs) will thank you! See recipe below:

Dog Biscuits

2 c. quick oats
4 c. whole wheat flour
2 tsp. cinnamon
2 c. water
2 tsp. vanilla

Combine dry ingredients and add remaining ingredients. Mix into a stiff dough. Roll out to ” thickness and cut into dog bone shapes. (Cutters available in most stores where cookie cutters are sold.) Brush with egg wash (1 beaten egg and 1 tablespoon water). Bake 30 minutes at 350 degrees. Bag, label (listing ingredients), and sell to dog owners. (Best if stored in refrigerator.) Yield: approx. 7 dozen.

Make sure that as your children are working on their goals, you recognize their efforts as well as the realized goal. Small rewards for efforts, such as an ice cream cone at the local store or an extra 20 minutes of water play one afternoon, can do wonders in keeping children motivated towards their final goal.

It’s infinitely more rewarding to teach children than it is to just tend or tolerate them. In other words, children will either exhaust your ideas or wear out your nerves. We vote for the ideas – there are many more where they come from and the memories made are so much better. So as summer approaches, make sure to have a master plan as you construct your days and fortify your home and family with the right tools – and you will have built a better kid!

Please see this column on July 10 th for The Priority Principle – Doing First Things First.