Being a person who misplaces her keys and rings a lot, I have become convinced that there is an angel assigned above to help me find my things because with rare exception I always find them, sometimes quite dramatically.


Keep that in mind while I tell you that I have several issues/burdens in my life that have gone on for many years. For example, and the least severe of the hardest two, are chronic migraines I have had for more than 40 years. I’m sure I’m not different from thousands and thousands of people who face similar trials in their lives, wondering why they cannot find release from burdens that continue for years and years.


Prayers about such burdens might sound something like “Why do I have to suffer for so long? Can’t I just learn whatever I need to know from this so I can get this over with? Can’t I have another trial instead of this one? I’m just so tired of this one. Could I just have a few years of my life free of this burden so I can know what life is like to not wake up with this sadness in my heart? Why does my trial have to last so long?”


So far, like many others who pray similar prayers I’m sure, I have never heard a voice or felt an impression on how long my trial will last or exactly what I’m supposed to learn from it so I might speed up the learning process. I’ve never heard a still, small voice whisper that I should just hold on for a little longer or that the Lord has heard my prayer and has taken under advisement my opinion that I have suffered long enough. I have never really even felt a warm, comforting feeling that others have described as they’ve prayed for help-a feeling for which I have prayed for years.


I have received beautiful priesthood blessings speaking to me of comfort and what I trust are truths about myself that I don’t necessarily see. But thankfully most of the time as I have prayed for release and help, I have stood up from my knees and my tears with my pain reduced and with inexplicable strength to pick up the burden again.


“No pain will last forever”


In some of my faith-filled moments, I find comfort in scriptures like D&C 122. But there are some days and nights that are very hard. Sometimes when times were really hard I wonder if my prayers were heard and in the darkest times in the past if there even was a God to hear my prayers. In my most faithless moments, I have reminded the Lord that Joseph Smith was only in Liberty Jail for nine months and I have been in my tribulation for almost 40 years. (Writers share raw pain-that’s what we do, whether it makes us look bad or not!)


Those times were few and far between, though, and most of the time I have had faith that one day I will understand why my trial has to last so long. At some point in the future I believe I will know that all I have endured will be worth it and I will be grateful for it. Until that time the grace of the Lord will help me bear it, as the scriptures and the present-day prophets promise me.


Out of all the messages from April 2012’s General Conference came five little words from Pres. Boyd K. Packer that gave me courage. In his talk “And A Little Child Shall Lead Them,” he said, “No pain will last forever.”


Lost Rings


Then one day not long ago I felt that the Lord taught me a lesson through one of my lost items, through my angel of lost things I suppose, and assured me that He is indeed aware of my long, long trial. It’s not time for it to be over, but He does know what I am going through.


Because I had developed arthritis in my ring finger I had to have my engagement and wedding ring cut off my finger a few months ago. They sat on top of my dresser until one afternoon my daughters were visiting and making earrings. I decided to take the rings along with other broken jewelry I had just to show my daughters how damaged the rings were.


But I got distracted between the bedroom and dining room and didn’t even think about them. Hours later I went back to the bedroom and found my engagement ring on my bed where it had apparently fallen, but there was no sign of my wedding ring.


We searched everywhere for the next four days. The ring could only have been in the bedroom, down one hallway, or in the kitchen or dining room. I went through the stinky garbage at least three times, searched through the recycling bin, looked under the bed several times and in every drawer, crawled on the floor, swept the floor, and looked through all my daughter’s jewelry-making supplies.


I avoided telling my husband because I was sure my angel was going to come through for me, but at the end of four days I was beginning to despair. I prayed and prayed and listened and listened as I have so many times before when I have lost and found so many things. There was nothing.


Then on the fourth day after I lost the rings, one daughter had gone home with her children and my other daughter was in one bedroom with her children. I walked from my bedroom down the hallway and into the kitchen and dining room, doing nothing particular. No one walked down the hallway or into my bedroom during that time.


Found Rings


Yet when I walked back down the hallway and turned to go into my bedroom again, there was my ring in clear sight in the middle of my bedroom doorway.


I picked up the ring and said a prayer of thanks to the Lord for returning my ring to me. I went to the bedroom when my daughter and her children were and told her what had happened. “You’re kidding me,” she said.


“Nope,” I said. “My angel came through for me again.”


Lesson Learned


But the ring wasn’t the main message for me.


The message for me was “I hear your prayers, Susan, and I know your needs. I can take your burdens from you as easily as I help you find rings that have been missing-as easily as I created the stars and the flowers and the vast mountain ranges.  And, before you took your next breath, I could make your life exactly how you think it should be. But I won’t. I won’t because you have given me your heart and committed your life to me and entrusted me with your future.


Therefore, I will do what is best for your eternal salvation even though it causes you pain now. But remember-I have been with you all these years, and I will be with however many more years this will continue and however much more it hurts.”


The rings have been repaired and I hope their once again unbroken circles will remind me of the circle of eternity, of which this painful mortality is just a small part. I hope I will remember how they were lost and how they were returned and the feeling of amazing grace that came with that experience so that I may cling to that memory in hard, lonely days that will surely come.

 

Susan is the author of “Miracle of the Christmas Star,” which can be ordered on www.mormonbooksandauthors.com