Your Hardest Family Question: How do I face the pain of miscarriage?
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Comments | Return to Story
JoshMarch 4, 2022
Exceptionally well written article. To my brothers and sister who suffer this pain I would like to add something. I cannot share the amazing spiritual experience that leads me to saying this but I know it to be true. Children lost, no matter when they are lost, are still a part of your eternal family. I know I will see my mother and grandmother again, both have passed in the past few years, but I also know that with them I will get to see my older sister, who passed in the womb, and learn who she is. I know that while my mortal eyes have not seen her, that her face is familiar to my spirit and I look forward to that reunion greatly. It is a driving force to keep my on the righteous path, amongst many others. You will also get to see the children that you were not permitted to raise in the flesh. No one can say that they understand your pain, except Christ, but I hope you find those that can comfort you while you recover.
KateMarch 4, 2022
I have also experienced miscarriage, and while the spiritual experience that accompanied it is too sacred to share on the internet, I'll give my opinion that when the body that spirit intended to use was not viable, there will be another body provided which will give him or her the opportunity to have a mortal experience. I cannot imagine our Heavenly Parents saying, "whoops, sorry, your body was miscarried (or your parents decided to terminate the pregnancy or your mom was in a car accident and your body died or whatever) so you are out of luck! No further progression for you!" Obviously not. I'm sure that every spirit that is slated to come to earth will come, and in a situation that will give them the experience that they need. Maybe even to you in a future pregnancy.
Melissa MarkhamMarch 4, 2022
I'm so sorry to read about your loss. It was sweet to read about the love you felt already for the baby. It's true that there is no official doctrine on the status of babies who have been miscarried. While I used to see this as frustrating, a friend helped me see it in a different way that has been comforting. I hope you don't mind my sharing this. Perhaps the spirit, itself, has a choice in whether to accept that mortal experience and family heritage or not. Some may opt to try again for a mortal body while some may go on into the eternities. I believe that the parents can receive guidance and know how to understand their individual experiences. My husband and I have felt strongly that at least one of the babies I miscarried has accepted his place in our family and passed into the eternities. We have felt his presence profoundly at times and eagerly await our reunion with him. During other miscarriages, I have tried to connect with the spirit and form a similar bond, only to come up empty. I see these as "chemical pregnancies" not necessarily associated with a spirit. I hope none of that comes off as awkward or contrary to church teaching. The important part to me is that a loving Heavenly Father and Savior Jesus Christ want to comfort us and help us understand. They know where our babies are! As I've been reassured in many blessings, they are intimately concerned with sending spirits to the earth and will help us work through emotions, questions, and anything else the experience brings. May they be with you now.
AnonymousMarch 4, 2022
I know that, if it is His will for you, you can receive personal revelation about this, and know whatever details He sees fit to grant you. It will come in His own time and way for you, but you can come to know His beautiful truths about your own family in this regard. We have seen it happen.
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