Thank you for sharing your experience and pointing out that, when taken to heart, the gospel of Jesus Christ is meant to make men (and women) good to the core. The best men are those who understand a woman’s worth in the eyes of God and treat each woman with respect and kindness. Thank you also for shedding light on the self-proclaimed “advocates” that do more harm than good by loudly “speaking for” those they don’t even represent or understand.
Carlos.June 28, 2022
What a beautiful and powerful article. Thank you for reminding us, and for pointing out to men what we must be.
HalJune 28, 2022
This was a tremendous article, thank you! I have tried my entire adult life to honor and protect the women in my life. It is wonderful to see an opinion of a sister who appreciates the positive influence the Gospel of Jesus Christ has on men and boys. I agree that there are many noble and virtuous men outside of the Church with like values. I would venture to say that there is a strong correlation between good men and strong religious values.
JulieJune 28, 2022
Thank you very much for sharing your experience and knowledge. It helped me.
Julie TreadwellJune 28, 2022
I appreciate this perspective from the author. Her life experience gives her a clarity on this topic that many of us lack. I have been raised in the church my whole life and have seen cultural changes for good in many ways. It has changed in the US culture as well. (I recently was part of a conversation regarding our experiences over jobs lost and blatantly unequal pay due to gender preference. There has been vast improvement from the outset of our careers compared to now.). I fear that there will always be the selfish and sexually driven underbelly of society, within and without the church, that will perpetuate the horrific treatment of others. And while the upper elements of society at large has more improving to do, it’s nice to remember that Good changes have occurred! Sometimes in our journey, we see the effort of the climb ahead and forget to acknowledge how far our efforts have brought us. Sometimes, being only on the INSIDE of a thing limits one’s views, understanding and experience. That often enhances the flaws and makes them feel unbearable. It may take help from OUTSIDE the thing to see the relative difference. Sometimes that “outside help” makes things seem worse. It’s refreshing when it helps us recognize how, as a whole, things are better than we realized. And reminds us that there are solid reasons why that is. I am grateful the author pointed out that the church culture isn’t the gospel. The church’s purpose is to help bring us to Christ. He will heal us. He will help us. He will improve us. WE are better when we, as men and women, want that for ourselves, and are willing to “do the work” necessary to obtain it.
LisaJune 28, 2022
Thank you for the heartfelt sharing of your story.
MichelleJune 28, 2022
My childhood had some similarities to yours though not as difficult. Due to some early abuse, I was left with a lot of confusion, guilt (tho I had done nothing wrong) and pain. I was painfully shy and afraid of everything. The boundaries and standards taught were a lifesaver for me. and the activities, dances and youth conferences gave me a window at least of what I could be. The sweet elders on my mission showed such a humility and respect for priesthood power that it was what was engraved in my heart instead of the pain and abuse. I am 52 and just now seeing the mission God has for me. Because of what I experienced I can relate to a very wide range of people. I have found that power comes in sitting with individuals and listening to them, hearing their story, loving them where they are. As in the Book of Mormon, society is trying to push people into categories, groups and getting them to dig in and scream opinions and condemnations. No matter how right or justified a certain viewpoint is, it doesn't matter if it is not delivered with the love and space and patience required to let that principle be received. Love truly does conquer all. As we love, God will work out the details.
LincolnJune 28, 2022
Here’s another bit of essential reading brought to us by MERIDIAN. My thanks to the editorial staff and the eloquent writer for creating and disseminating this thoughtful, insightful, sometimes heart-wrenching document. In addition to her personal story, the writer’s observations about our larger culture are true, revealing, and cautionary. Thanks to all.
SageJune 28, 2022
Thank you for sharing your insights. I agree with your assessment of how the church shapes men. I am Daily blessed by a man who takes his priesthood seriously who can clearly show it was the church's influence that made him who he is.
Taylor StonelyJune 28, 2022
Thank you for the courage to tell your story, and what an incredible perspective you offer. I appreciate you taking the time to provide a valuable counter-argument to the vicious attacks made by those who wish to harm the Church and its teachings of Jesus Christ. While none of us is perfect, it is important to know and to describe the path that we should all be walking, toward heaven, instead of pointing fingers and mocking those who are clinging to the iron rod.
Comments | Return to Story
Winslow KJune 29, 2022
Thank you for sharing your experience and pointing out that, when taken to heart, the gospel of Jesus Christ is meant to make men (and women) good to the core. The best men are those who understand a woman’s worth in the eyes of God and treat each woman with respect and kindness. Thank you also for shedding light on the self-proclaimed “advocates” that do more harm than good by loudly “speaking for” those they don’t even represent or understand.
Carlos.June 28, 2022
What a beautiful and powerful article. Thank you for reminding us, and for pointing out to men what we must be.
HalJune 28, 2022
This was a tremendous article, thank you! I have tried my entire adult life to honor and protect the women in my life. It is wonderful to see an opinion of a sister who appreciates the positive influence the Gospel of Jesus Christ has on men and boys. I agree that there are many noble and virtuous men outside of the Church with like values. I would venture to say that there is a strong correlation between good men and strong religious values.
JulieJune 28, 2022
Thank you very much for sharing your experience and knowledge. It helped me.
Julie TreadwellJune 28, 2022
I appreciate this perspective from the author. Her life experience gives her a clarity on this topic that many of us lack. I have been raised in the church my whole life and have seen cultural changes for good in many ways. It has changed in the US culture as well. (I recently was part of a conversation regarding our experiences over jobs lost and blatantly unequal pay due to gender preference. There has been vast improvement from the outset of our careers compared to now.). I fear that there will always be the selfish and sexually driven underbelly of society, within and without the church, that will perpetuate the horrific treatment of others. And while the upper elements of society at large has more improving to do, it’s nice to remember that Good changes have occurred! Sometimes in our journey, we see the effort of the climb ahead and forget to acknowledge how far our efforts have brought us. Sometimes, being only on the INSIDE of a thing limits one’s views, understanding and experience. That often enhances the flaws and makes them feel unbearable. It may take help from OUTSIDE the thing to see the relative difference. Sometimes that “outside help” makes things seem worse. It’s refreshing when it helps us recognize how, as a whole, things are better than we realized. And reminds us that there are solid reasons why that is. I am grateful the author pointed out that the church culture isn’t the gospel. The church’s purpose is to help bring us to Christ. He will heal us. He will help us. He will improve us. WE are better when we, as men and women, want that for ourselves, and are willing to “do the work” necessary to obtain it.
LisaJune 28, 2022
Thank you for the heartfelt sharing of your story.
MichelleJune 28, 2022
My childhood had some similarities to yours though not as difficult. Due to some early abuse, I was left with a lot of confusion, guilt (tho I had done nothing wrong) and pain. I was painfully shy and afraid of everything. The boundaries and standards taught were a lifesaver for me. and the activities, dances and youth conferences gave me a window at least of what I could be. The sweet elders on my mission showed such a humility and respect for priesthood power that it was what was engraved in my heart instead of the pain and abuse. I am 52 and just now seeing the mission God has for me. Because of what I experienced I can relate to a very wide range of people. I have found that power comes in sitting with individuals and listening to them, hearing their story, loving them where they are. As in the Book of Mormon, society is trying to push people into categories, groups and getting them to dig in and scream opinions and condemnations. No matter how right or justified a certain viewpoint is, it doesn't matter if it is not delivered with the love and space and patience required to let that principle be received. Love truly does conquer all. As we love, God will work out the details.
LincolnJune 28, 2022
Here’s another bit of essential reading brought to us by MERIDIAN. My thanks to the editorial staff and the eloquent writer for creating and disseminating this thoughtful, insightful, sometimes heart-wrenching document. In addition to her personal story, the writer’s observations about our larger culture are true, revealing, and cautionary. Thanks to all.
SageJune 28, 2022
Thank you for sharing your insights. I agree with your assessment of how the church shapes men. I am Daily blessed by a man who takes his priesthood seriously who can clearly show it was the church's influence that made him who he is.
Taylor StonelyJune 28, 2022
Thank you for the courage to tell your story, and what an incredible perspective you offer. I appreciate you taking the time to provide a valuable counter-argument to the vicious attacks made by those who wish to harm the Church and its teachings of Jesus Christ. While none of us is perfect, it is important to know and to describe the path that we should all be walking, toward heaven, instead of pointing fingers and mocking those who are clinging to the iron rod.
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