Wonderful article! The power of the Adversary has been indeed unleashed like never before, and only being diligent in seeking the power of the atonement into our lives can save us from this terrible evil. Latter-Day Saint pioneers were faced with persecution and having to cross the plains under harsh conditions. Our fights against adversity may not be physical but spiritual, but just about as intense.
stevie maireid mckennaMay 7, 2021
Excellent subject. I think both mothers and fathers should address this with their sons but also their daughters as well. Fathers may have a stronger influence with this subject than mothers would as they can relate from their own experiences when they were an adolescent boy. Also, a boy may feel more comfortable discussing this subject with dad and a little uncomfortable with talking about it with mom.
Alisa HallMay 7, 2021
Thank you for your vulnerability! This is a topic that needs more light and open discussions especially regarding how to respond and love unconditionally those close to us who struggle with pornography. One of the best books a therapist suggested I read regarding pornography is titled “The Language of Recovery” by Gordon S.Bruin M.A., L.P.C. (Amazon) His book helps you understand the “why” and how to relearn your responses to loved ones in a compassionate and hopeful way. I also feel we need to be very careful throwing the word “Addiction” around when someone is struggling with pornography. Most individuals who struggle are not addicted based on the psychological definition.
EPHMay 6, 2021
My fight covered several decades. I've had in my life a lot of circumstances that have made the fight almost impossible. Mental health can be a big component. But it all has kept me more humble before the Lord and in a state of continual gratitude for His mercy. Surprisingly this article already addresses most of the things I could talk about. Good job!
Michael HogganMay 6, 2021
Mothers also need to be self-aware about any women's magazines, clothing catalogues and "romance" novels they might have in the house. Do they watch soap operas? I suspect many women have a double standard about risque material. They only object to risque material targeted at men.
Timothy D JohnsonMay 6, 2021
I have explained to my female friends that, for a man, it becomes a hunger that drives to be fulfilled. Not many women can understand this but it is the method that drives us to unite ourselves in marriage. Otherwise why would a man want to take the responsibility for a wife and children (from an old missionary discussion, "j", I think) ?
That is why a woman should be sympathetic to her husbands needs.
Another thing that is not widely understood yet is that women have much more Oxytocin, the hormone that create bonding and love. It has been proven that the only time a man gets a surge in his Oxytocin is when he has an orgasm through intercourse. Hence because of that he bonds with his wife and love grows between them. Deny him this and tragic circumstance may follow. But as Priesthood holders, we need to learn how to practice self control as is dictated in the Scriptures and be courteous to our wives also!
Yves ValenMay 6, 2021
Excellent article. Something every father, mother, and Church leaders should read. The description she makes of the world in which we live is so accurate. But there is hope, absolute hope in the rescueing power of the Lord to help all of His children overcome temptations. That is the reason why He asked His disciples (which all of us are) to pray always in order to overcome them.
ShaunaMay 6, 2021
Thank you so much for this gutsy, brave and enlightening article. It does indeed seem that young men in our society are being attacked from every side. I am raising girls and just pray that there are some worthy young men out there for them to date and marry someday. You have helped me at least understand what those young men (and now frequently, women) are up against.
StevenMay 6, 2021
I am a former bishop, and have seen the effects of pornography on individuals and families. How remarkable to hear a woman express what every normal mortal human male since Adam has experienced! This is as significant as if a man had experienced, hormonally, what it is like to be pregnant. It is almost unbelievable, yet her descriptions of the raging hormonal torrent are right on the money. Every male I have ever known is tossed into the river at puberty and remains there until disease or geriatric decay pushes him into the eddies and slower side currents. No one I know has ever actually gotten out of the river. Society has always just expected us to "bridle your passions" and learn how to body surf in the rapids. This article is wonderful for mothers of sons. What might it mean for wives of husbands?
Wayne LarsenMay 6, 2021
Terrific article! I hope many others read it.
Name WithheldMay 6, 2021
This essay is important and perhaps essential.
Thanks to MERIDIAN for regularly publishing articles on sex, by which I mean passion and sometimes sin. Hooray for the editorial policy. Few topics are more timely and important, and silence is not the answer.
The author deserves a gold medal . In the mean time, she has my thanks.
The YM general presidency should find out who she is and put her on their board. (No, not the YW.)
Whoever she is, she had to take time and energy and courage to produce her article, and I, for one, am grateful, both personally and because I think she has performed a moral service to the Saints.
BecMay 6, 2021
Thank you for this article. I have had boys that struggled with this and I felt terrible for them. I know it is so tough for them. You brought out some really good points.
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CharlieBrown2292May 7, 2021
Wonderful article! The power of the Adversary has been indeed unleashed like never before, and only being diligent in seeking the power of the atonement into our lives can save us from this terrible evil. Latter-Day Saint pioneers were faced with persecution and having to cross the plains under harsh conditions. Our fights against adversity may not be physical but spiritual, but just about as intense.
stevie maireid mckennaMay 7, 2021
Excellent subject. I think both mothers and fathers should address this with their sons but also their daughters as well. Fathers may have a stronger influence with this subject than mothers would as they can relate from their own experiences when they were an adolescent boy. Also, a boy may feel more comfortable discussing this subject with dad and a little uncomfortable with talking about it with mom.
Alisa HallMay 7, 2021
Thank you for your vulnerability! This is a topic that needs more light and open discussions especially regarding how to respond and love unconditionally those close to us who struggle with pornography. One of the best books a therapist suggested I read regarding pornography is titled “The Language of Recovery” by Gordon S.Bruin M.A., L.P.C. (Amazon) His book helps you understand the “why” and how to relearn your responses to loved ones in a compassionate and hopeful way. I also feel we need to be very careful throwing the word “Addiction” around when someone is struggling with pornography. Most individuals who struggle are not addicted based on the psychological definition.
EPHMay 6, 2021
My fight covered several decades. I've had in my life a lot of circumstances that have made the fight almost impossible. Mental health can be a big component. But it all has kept me more humble before the Lord and in a state of continual gratitude for His mercy. Surprisingly this article already addresses most of the things I could talk about. Good job!
Michael HogganMay 6, 2021
Mothers also need to be self-aware about any women's magazines, clothing catalogues and "romance" novels they might have in the house. Do they watch soap operas? I suspect many women have a double standard about risque material. They only object to risque material targeted at men.
Timothy D JohnsonMay 6, 2021
I have explained to my female friends that, for a man, it becomes a hunger that drives to be fulfilled. Not many women can understand this but it is the method that drives us to unite ourselves in marriage. Otherwise why would a man want to take the responsibility for a wife and children (from an old missionary discussion, "j", I think) ? That is why a woman should be sympathetic to her husbands needs. Another thing that is not widely understood yet is that women have much more Oxytocin, the hormone that create bonding and love. It has been proven that the only time a man gets a surge in his Oxytocin is when he has an orgasm through intercourse. Hence because of that he bonds with his wife and love grows between them. Deny him this and tragic circumstance may follow. But as Priesthood holders, we need to learn how to practice self control as is dictated in the Scriptures and be courteous to our wives also!
Yves ValenMay 6, 2021
Excellent article. Something every father, mother, and Church leaders should read. The description she makes of the world in which we live is so accurate. But there is hope, absolute hope in the rescueing power of the Lord to help all of His children overcome temptations. That is the reason why He asked His disciples (which all of us are) to pray always in order to overcome them.
ShaunaMay 6, 2021
Thank you so much for this gutsy, brave and enlightening article. It does indeed seem that young men in our society are being attacked from every side. I am raising girls and just pray that there are some worthy young men out there for them to date and marry someday. You have helped me at least understand what those young men (and now frequently, women) are up against.
StevenMay 6, 2021
I am a former bishop, and have seen the effects of pornography on individuals and families. How remarkable to hear a woman express what every normal mortal human male since Adam has experienced! This is as significant as if a man had experienced, hormonally, what it is like to be pregnant. It is almost unbelievable, yet her descriptions of the raging hormonal torrent are right on the money. Every male I have ever known is tossed into the river at puberty and remains there until disease or geriatric decay pushes him into the eddies and slower side currents. No one I know has ever actually gotten out of the river. Society has always just expected us to "bridle your passions" and learn how to body surf in the rapids. This article is wonderful for mothers of sons. What might it mean for wives of husbands?
Wayne LarsenMay 6, 2021
Terrific article! I hope many others read it.
Name WithheldMay 6, 2021
This essay is important and perhaps essential. Thanks to MERIDIAN for regularly publishing articles on sex, by which I mean passion and sometimes sin. Hooray for the editorial policy. Few topics are more timely and important, and silence is not the answer. The author deserves a gold medal . In the mean time, she has my thanks. The YM general presidency should find out who she is and put her on their board. (No, not the YW.) Whoever she is, she had to take time and energy and courage to produce her article, and I, for one, am grateful, both personally and because I think she has performed a moral service to the Saints.
BecMay 6, 2021
Thank you for this article. I have had boys that struggled with this and I felt terrible for them. I know it is so tough for them. You brought out some really good points.
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