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December 8, 2024

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Debbi M.December 10, 2020

To Patricia: I can only image your pain. You can still be healed--it does not take renewing a negative relationship to do that. You sound much better off without the hurt of that relationship. You are not less because you choose not to be with that man anymore. Be kind to yourself. You are the one in charge of your own happiness, and not a damaged vessel. Be free and positive!

A happy wife in recoveryDecember 9, 2020

This was good to listen to now. I bought the book 10 years ago when it first came out. It was scary and painful then. I am so much farther down the road of healing. I just want wives to know that healing is possible through the Atonement of the Lord Jesus Christ. I can't saw where my husband is in his journey, since he is still not ready to share his thoughts, feelings or experiences with me. I have always stuck with him, since we are married for time and eternity. I still have hope for him to change and be happy!. I found that I couldn't change him; I could only change myselt to be a happy person. I have grown closer to the Savior and my husband by accepting him, forgiving him and love HIM, NOT his behavior. Once I could separate the two, I could heal.. Thank you for the book and the podcast. You guys are wonderful!

Patricia G. SchellDecember 8, 2020

Sadly, I do not want to heal, to renew the relationship. Forgiving is enough. I can not put myself in that place again. One of trust that was betrayed not just through pornography but so many little instances over 43 years, that I didn't begin to put together until the meaness became unbearable and extended to our grown children. Do I still care? As for a former friend. I still worry but not to the point of putting myself at further risk and pain. Too many years of broken trust, because I so much wanted to trust. To believe. It's very lonely. A different kind of pain, but still pain.

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