Entertaiment

Cause of Death
by Kieth Merrill

If you read my article, The Enemy Among Us, and discounted my fears of pornographic terrorism, read on. Your response to the epidemic of pornography has been sobering, serious and sad.

A Bishop reported his weary struggle against the “epidemic of pornography” among members of his flock.

Readers added stories of broken marriages and devestated lives.

Our friend, Carmen — who keeps the house so Dagny can focus on running her non-profit educational foundation — told me her own chilling story of abuse arising from perversion. Her monstrous memories has left her with a dread of pornography.

Recently Carmen was hired as housekeeper by a “perfect American family” in a high-end neighborhood near by. Mom, Dad, two kids, a boy 14, a girl 11. While cleaning the boy’s room she discovered an enormous stash of pornographic magazines. “The very worst kind”, she explained. She didn’t open the closet again. More than once his computer was left on with images of the most vile nature left in open view. Over time it became apparent that the 14 year old was not only addicted to pornography he was acting out his perverted fantasies..

Both parents worked. On many of the days Carmen worked in the house the boy came home early followed by a gaggle of teenagers. “They would go up to his room, lock the door and have an pornographic orgy,” my friend reported.

“And I was expected to clean up.” Fighting tears and dark memories Carmen went on to describe the obvious evidence at what went on at these teenage porn parties. It is devastating to contemplate the consequences in the lives of these youngsters and even more frightening to consider the potential destruction of the lives they’ll touch. Carmen quit her job at 666 Country Club Drive.

Do you know what YOUR children are doing? Are you sure?

My March offering here at Meridian Magazine was planned to be a happy, upbeat follow-on to last Month’s Go Make A Movie. There are some fascinating new technologies, software and digital pathways to your great, great grandfather – and family history movies — I want to tell you about. And will.

But as I worked on my bright and sunny article, your shock, dismay, and startling stories kept arriving at my desk. It was the following letter that pushed me over the edge. It was the following true story that persuaded me to fire one more warning shot across our bows.

The Enemy Among Us ends with these words; “The enemy is real and lives among us. An act of terrorism can kill your body in a moment suddenly . An addiction to pornography will kill your soul one image at a time.”

Now I know that Pornography can take your life by murder.

The following hand written letter arrived in the mail. I could almost see dried stains of tears as I read it over and over again. I was given permission to share it with you. The names have been changed to protect the children of the murdered woman.

Dear Kieth,

I’m the mother of Jane Williams. She and her husband Robert knew your family many years ago.

Last week I received an e-mail from a relative and it was a copy of an article you’d written titled, The Enemy Among Us. It really hit home because you mentioned a friend of yours who had gotten involved in pornography and his retreat into denial and rationalization rather than remorse and repentance. This may man sounds like Robert, my daughter’s husband.

If not, it must be someone very much like him. Robert not only ruined his life, but many others as well, including mine.

He killed my daughter, Jane. That was four years ago. It has been devastating. And this horrible deed began with his involvement in pornography.

I don’t know how long Robert had been involved with pornography before my daughter found out. Jane discovered his addiction when they had been married for almost 10 years. Her eyes were opened accidentally. After Robert had gone on a business trip she found a roll of film he brought home and had it developed. She was shocked when she discovered the pictures that he had taken.

She had thought that Robert was almost perfect when they were married. Discovering his dark side was a terrible shock. She confronted him. He then confessed perverted activities with his older brother when he was younger and blamed his actions on him. Robert never took any responsibilities for his own actions. He promised to get counseling. Later he was arrested in a near-by city for stealing pornographic software but hired an attorney to keep it off his record.

The next 10 years were difficult to say the least, but Jane tried to stick it out until the children were older. Of course the children knew nothing of their father’s addiction. Jane didn’t want them to know and kept it from them.

Jane didn’t tell me about Robert’s sexual addictions for a couple of years after she found out because she was so humiliated. When she finally told me I was stunned because Robert was like the boy next door–not someone you could imagine would be into such things.

The Internet was another source of his addiction. Robert’s perverted obsessions lead to adultery and an affair with one of his student at the Junior College where he taught.

Robert was ex-communicated from the church. Jane had talked about leaving him for several years but tried to stick it out for the children – and because she was afraid.

When she finally decided to leave Robert he killed her.

Robert was a great manipulator. He’d threatened to kill Jane if she ever left him. Her persuaded her to tear out the pages of her personal journal where she had mentioned the problems he was having.

She told a friend after Robert threatened to kill her that if anything happened to her she had recorded these things, but Robert Promised to change so she tore the pages out and burned them. When I received her journal after her death there were pages missing as she had numbered them.

The following came from the pages of her journal, “I have decided to separate from Robert. People would be shocked to know that if it wasn’t for the kids, Robert and I would have divorced him already.I feel a lot of stress and pressure and I don’t know what to do. I don’t know if I can hang on for 10 years but I can’t see any other way. I wish things could have worked out differently. I am living a huge lie and I am miserable!”

It breaks my heart to know how desperate my daughter was and that I couldn’t help her. Once when I went to see her she begged me not to leave, crying, but I had to leave. It nearly tore me apart.

The night before her death she called me at midnight and said that they’d been to see the attorney and that things hadn’t gone well.

“At this point I am willing to give Robert whatever he asked for – I just want out!” she said, “and he’s still balking Mom, and I don’t know where he is.”

“I love you”, we both said. Those were our last words to one another and when we hung up I said to my husband, “I’m so afraid that Robert might try to kill Jane.”

It was a mother’s intuition, but my husband replied, “Oh Robert would never do anything like that.” But he did

He was brutal. He used a baseball bat and then tried to cover his tracks by dumping her body over a ravine. We found out later at the trial that the night of the murder he’d been at his office e-mailing a woman from Texas that he’d found on the Internet and was planning to meet in May. He murdered my daughter the last week of April.

I know first hand how deadly serious pornography really is.

Their children are finally doing well under the circumstance. The trial was very difficult for them to endure as they’d always looked up to their father – in fact, they idealized him. Their mother never told them about the sins that their father had committed so they were shocked with disbelief when they heard some of these things at the proceedings.

As for Robert, he got away with murder. He received a sentence of only 7 years for voluntary manslaughter and will be eligible for parole in a few more years. His attorney twisted the truth around to make it Jane’s fault because “she made him angry.” The jury bought it. Denial and rationalization. It was his addiction, his perversion, and his sickness that killed my daughter.

Thank you for your time.
Name withheld

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